If my roomate asked me to pick up my socks off the floor, they would remain there forever more.
If my wife asks......I obey immediately, if not sooner, lest she unleash The Tempest!
Moving in with my girlfriend?
- Thread starter Latherdude
- Start date
If my roomate asked me to pick up my socks off the floor, they would remain there forever more.
If my wife asks......I obey immediately, if not sooner, lest she unleash The Tempest!
So, you're not just living together, you're leasing the relationship, so to speak.....?
Not quite up to a purchase (marriage), but available for a trade in/upgrade after the initial contract expires. Sort of like my iPhone deal with AT&T.
Sorry, I'm being facetious just for the sake of debate....
So...am I going to bail on my marriage after I'm doing paying off my mortgage? "Well, been nice knowin' ya, but now that we're not bound by that pesky mortgage..."
My original point is that moving in together is a huge decision, financially and emotionally, which is a few steps beyond "eh, let's see how it goes" for most people. It's a serious commitment, which you make with someone who you are seriously committed to.
Couples (married and unmarried) make joint financial decisions all the time. Sharing a lease don't make your partner your roommate.
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I guess I'm not really seeing this one. Sharing financial responsibilities = roommate? Sure I live in a different apartment with my fiance than I'd be living in if I was single. I bet most of you married gents are living in a different home than you would be if you were single too (and I've seen more than enough post-divorce man-caves to know that's true!)
A few steps beyond, that's true, yet still a few steps shy of marriage, yes?
They key to this analogy is that you are comparing a post divorce (with resultant likely alimony, child support, etc. drain), as compared to the possibilities of an unfettered, legendary, bachelor pad
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Certainly!
Slash McCoy
I freehand dog rockets
She sounds like a keeper so far.
+1 on the uke. The very best serenading instrument.
The only real caveat here is you need to understand and be realistic about the chances of this lasting forever. More than likely, at some point the relationship will sour. Not trying to rain on your parade or anything. Even if it doesn't last, it can still be pretty darn good and leave you with great memories. But my point is to always keep in mind that you may have to extricate yourself at some point. So go easy on stuff like joint bank accounts, signing leases, stuff like that. Have a bailout plan. Meanwhile, I would cultivate this relationship and see where it leads. Better to go for it and eventually be disappointed, than to not go for it and always wonder if she might have been Miss Right.
I have seen relationships where the woman made more $ than the man, and this eventually got rubbed in his face, or he felt unmanned or inadequate. Make sure you are really and truly okay with this.
+1 on the uke. The very best serenading instrument.
The only real caveat here is you need to understand and be realistic about the chances of this lasting forever. More than likely, at some point the relationship will sour. Not trying to rain on your parade or anything. Even if it doesn't last, it can still be pretty darn good and leave you with great memories. But my point is to always keep in mind that you may have to extricate yourself at some point. So go easy on stuff like joint bank accounts, signing leases, stuff like that. Have a bailout plan. Meanwhile, I would cultivate this relationship and see where it leads. Better to go for it and eventually be disappointed, than to not go for it and always wonder if she might have been Miss Right.
I have seen relationships where the woman made more $ than the man, and this eventually got rubbed in his face, or he felt unmanned or inadequate. Make sure you are really and truly okay with this.
Two points:
1. Communication is key. Always. No matter what the subject matter (meals/finances/are "we" watching the game or Gossip Girl?), talk to her.
2. Whether this leads to marriage or the relationship ends, enjoy it! Find something special in the day-to-day routines and take time to really enjoy the good and simple things.
1. Communication is key. Always. No matter what the subject matter (meals/finances/are "we" watching the game or Gossip Girl?), talk to her.
2. Whether this leads to marriage or the relationship ends, enjoy it! Find something special in the day-to-day routines and take time to really enjoy the good and simple things.
Interesting debate. Sounds like you guys have been talking about moving in and you're both ready for that. Why not let that be enough for now? If this works out, great. If you decide you want to get married, that's great too. It doesn't all have to happen at the same time. It doesn't have to happen at all. Enjoy this for what it is. I did see a post earlier about doing your finances together. I think that you guys need to work out an equitable way to make sure that all of the bills get paid, but beyond that, don't rush into anything. If this doesn't work out and your finances are all jumbled up together, you are in for some problems.
Antique Hoosier
“Aircooled”
09/06/86 Got Married
07/07/07 Found out I was getting divorced
09/17/07 Officially Divorced
07/04/10 Moved in with "Girlfriend"
11/11/11 Moved out
12/10/11 Met Melissa (my current wife)
02/22/12 Got Engaged
05/11/12 Got Married
Isn't Life Strange???.............. There is really no planning it....
07/07/07 Found out I was getting divorced
09/17/07 Officially Divorced
07/04/10 Moved in with "Girlfriend"
11/11/11 Moved out
12/10/11 Met Melissa (my current wife)
02/22/12 Got Engaged
05/11/12 Got Married
Isn't Life Strange???.............. There is really no planning it....
I am approaching 12 years in my first (and only) marriage and I have to say its been completely worth it. It's the best work ever.
We did live together for about a year before we got married. It was nice to make sure we were able to live together as anyone can be charming on a date. I think if you both want to move in then you should.
We did live together for about a year before we got married. It was nice to make sure we were able to live together as anyone can be charming on a date. I think if you both want to move in then you should.
My wife of 18 years and I lived together for 10 months prior to marriage. I guess it all worked out.
Just found this, may be of some help:
http://screen.yahoo.com/mansome-episode-55-moving-girlfriend-080100243.html
http://screen.yahoo.com/mansome-episode-55-moving-girlfriend-080100243.html
- Thread starter
- #53
Well, it's official! We'll see how it goes, but I have a very good feeling about her. Now, I'm off to unpack boxes!
Thanks, everyone, for all of your insight and perspectives.
Thanks, everyone, for all of your insight and perspectives.
Congrats Brian, and good luck! You really get to know someone once you live with them.
Been living with my lady for about 6 years and fortunately things are still running smooth.
Just remember, sometimes its a better choice to bite your tongue and take a deep breath than it is to open your mouth.
Been living with my lady for about 6 years and fortunately things are still running smooth.
Just remember, sometimes its a better choice to bite your tongue and take a deep breath than it is to open your mouth.
You can be right, or you can be happy.
Amen.
- Thread starter
- #57
Just remember, sometimes its a better choice to bite your tongue and take a deep breath than it is to open your mouth.
Duly noted, good sirs!
Nanna:
Sorry for taking so long in replying (what was I thinking?
Italian Herb Garden - Mixed Field Salad w/ a zesty Vinaigrette Emulsion Dressing w/ Walnuts
Bavette Filet Romana – Tender Beef Flank Steak, sautéed, flamed with Cognac, sliced (on the diangle, with a Balsamic Green Peppercorn sauce (plate the sauce first, then arrange the flank steak in a fan).
Roated Baby Carrots & Baby Corn Medley
Patata Al Forno – Stuffed Baked Potatoes
Panna Cotta - an Light Italian dessert w/ Fresh Strawberry, Mango & Blackberry Purée (garnish w/ Fresh Mint).
Prosecco - White (semi-sweet), Italian Wine
Garnish – Tomato Rose w/ Snap Pea Fan
and then we went to the Casino.
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Usually, the correct answer is "Yes, dear." That is because it keeps momma happy, and we all know, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." Congrats and good luck.
