I knew one day I would have to make this decision, but in my heart I hoped I’d never have to. While I’m typing this, my best friend of 15 years lays wrapped in a blanket on his bed beside mine, sleeping. My “baby boy” Diesel (my avatar) is not eating and has had 2 trips to the vet in the last 7 days. Yesterday I received results from his blood test and it was one of the worst case scenarios. ”His phosphorus levels are high and looking at these numbers, I’d estimate he’s lost 1/2 to 3/4 of the function of his kidneys” the vet explained. I didn’t want to believe it...I still don’t want to believe it.
They’ve offered and IV treatment that “may” help push the toxins out and get him eating again. However, it will not reverse what’s happening to his kidneys.
And this has been happening so fast, as it usually does with our pets. One day he’s eating, out for his walk, snuggling with my daughters. The next few days it’s been pleading with him to eat rice and chicken broth and forcing pills down his throat. Yesterday he ate for the first time in 3 days. This morning we’re back to square one.
Ultimately I know what I’m going to have to do. There’s a part of me that felt like writing this out would justify and give me strength to make the decision to have him put down. Of course, there’s that little voice of hope in the back of my head that keeps trying to convince me that he’ll come around... and in reading this and having had to put down his brother Harley 5 years ago, you and I all know our furry family members won’t ever recover.
I hate this. I know ending any potential suffering is the right move. But the feelings of selfishness and guilt are overwhelming. I’d never do anything to hurt my boy, but the conflict of putting him down makes me feel like I’m doing more harm than good. It’s so stupid, I know. I’m waiting to hear back about the IV treatment today and I guess I’ll make a decision from there.
I wish dogs would live as long as we do. For a family member who never really says anything, they sure do understand us, don’t they?
Wish me luck.
Brad.
They’ve offered and IV treatment that “may” help push the toxins out and get him eating again. However, it will not reverse what’s happening to his kidneys.
And this has been happening so fast, as it usually does with our pets. One day he’s eating, out for his walk, snuggling with my daughters. The next few days it’s been pleading with him to eat rice and chicken broth and forcing pills down his throat. Yesterday he ate for the first time in 3 days. This morning we’re back to square one.
Ultimately I know what I’m going to have to do. There’s a part of me that felt like writing this out would justify and give me strength to make the decision to have him put down. Of course, there’s that little voice of hope in the back of my head that keeps trying to convince me that he’ll come around... and in reading this and having had to put down his brother Harley 5 years ago, you and I all know our furry family members won’t ever recover.
I hate this. I know ending any potential suffering is the right move. But the feelings of selfishness and guilt are overwhelming. I’d never do anything to hurt my boy, but the conflict of putting him down makes me feel like I’m doing more harm than good. It’s so stupid, I know. I’m waiting to hear back about the IV treatment today and I guess I’ll make a decision from there.
I wish dogs would live as long as we do. For a family member who never really says anything, they sure do understand us, don’t they?
Wish me luck.
Brad.