Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write, for example,'The night is shattered
and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.
Through nights like this one I held her in my arms
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.
She loved me sometimes, and I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.
etc...
"Pablo Neruda"
Poor Pablo is dead but there are many other sad souls there that keep that spirit alive. I am one of them. After all...tonight I can write the saddest lines...I can write for example that "yesterday I have joined a forum of Cheaters and Liars."
Why might you ask? Well...sit down friend and have a read.
This all started with our annual visit to Nisqually Wildlife center close to Olympia, WA. Our family has this tradition to welcome the New Year by taking a stroll on the Boardwalk and sometimes watch people who watch birds. People get fanatic over this stuff, especially bird watchers. This is the kind of place you will be asked for example whether the eagle perched up on that solitary tree is a "juvenile, 2 year old eagle."
Right...
So I am having a conversation with my brother in law as we are watching the snowy Mount Rainier's reflection on the Puget Sound waters and the conversation turns upon shaving creams. It's timely because in an effort to completely rid myself of all the toxins in my body I have thought several times that maybe my aerosol can of Gillette gel I shave with might not be the purest of things. I have been looking for a better, healthier option. My brother in law says:
"You really need to shave with a soap puck and a brush. It's so good for you and much healthier. But if you do that, then you might as well pick up a safety razor and shave the old school way...you know, the way our dads and grandpas used to."
Now I find this a bit intriguing in a weird John Wayne way...I don't know what my dad shaved with but I seemed to recall it was a Gillette. Each morning he would shave til his neck was red and then leave the blade and razor on a towel over the countertop to dry them up. Pretty cool huh? Watching him as a kid was fascinating though, as I enjoyed what seemed to be his ritual, especially his dabbing some aftershave on his face right after the shave. What fascinated me also, were the clean swaths the razor would leave on his face as it mowed down whiskers and shaving cream alike.
So far so good. And I wish the conversation had just stayed there without a single word added. But then my brother in law blurts out the biggest LIE of the century...
"BESIDES...IT"S THE CHEAPEST WAY TO SHAVE"
Now this got my attention. Healthy is fine, but healthy AND cheap...is super fine. I asked him how come and he says: "You get 100 Astra blades in amazon and they cost you what, like 10 bucks...and you can shave 3-4 times with a blade. How much are you paying for your cartridges? Now of course there's the initial cost of brush and razor but that's an INVESTMENT." (My brother in law sells for a living)
I didn't know exactly how much because my wife buys all the cartridges at Costco but I knew it wasn't 10 bucks. I had a general idea that my Mach 3 cartridges were pretty expensive. Needless to say this piqued my interest and I had to look it up. The John Wayne way of shaving right...Yeehaw!!!
It started innocently enough by watching a few YouTube videos of GeoFatboy, NickShaves, KevyShaves etc...just to see what I might be getting into. There was no denial it was healthier and I understood that whole "cartridge face abuse" theory and why. I did notice though, that these YouTube stars seemed to have an awful lot of gear they were shaving with but my mantra was..."Let's get a beginner razor like an Edwin Jaegger DE 89, a simple $8 brush in amazon (cheap) and a soap...let's go with Himalaya (Henry Cavendish) around $12. Now we are all set...that's like what $55? Ok fine add Astras 100 pack...that's like $65...and we can splurge on a wooden lather bowl for like $8. We are set for life for the low, low price of $73. I couldn't help but think that I could shave this cheaply for a couple of years. My dad was smiling at me from the distance, beckoning me with his soapy beard into the special club reserved for "real men who shave with safety razors."
But wait...what's this? There was a bit of advertisement in Amazon for a Viking Chieftain razor. Mind you, my DE89 hasn't even been shipped yet, but this Chieftain...ooohh, this looks nice. Deprived of any variety from years of shaving with a Cartridge razor, the words of advertisement appear forged in Viking Steel and the land of Valhalla...tagline..."PURE RAW MANLINESS."
Man...this stuff looks good. Oh well, I suppose I will be saving so much money that a second "TRAVEL RAZOR" won't hurt...$35 later my Viking Chieftain is in the shopping cart and is the first of the 2 to be delivered. Same day my brush and soap puck was delivered and it was time for my first shave. I put on the Astra on the Chieftain, made up some rather soupy lather and then proceeded to...cut myself a few times. Ah...F*** this. For a split second, my Mach 3 looked pretty enticing. But the masochist in me persevered...The next day, and the day after, and the day after that. My sink never thirsted for blood that much before. I launched into more YouTube videos, and concluded it was the brush's fault. Of course it was. Anyone who cut themselves like that didn't have the protection or slickness of proper lather. And what makes great lather? Expensive brushes...duh...
My next purchase was a Parker SilverTip Badger brush...another $64 or so. And for good measure let's add a Plissoft Monster to that cause why the F*** not and let's add more soap. F*** Henry Cavendish and his Himalaya soap, let's get good stuff.
My brother in law, that renegade, always comes to the rescue with this stuff..."You gotta get some Prorasso Green man...and the minty smell...so fresh and clean. Leaves my face as smooth as a baby and mountains of lather."
There goes the Prorasso Green in my shopping cart, and since it's same line, might as well add the Prorasso white and the red too. Armed to the teeth with these weapons we will leave no stone unturned. I make a pact with myself not to count the $$$ at this point because they are the last purchase anyways
While the Prorasso Green was being shipped I continue watching more YouTube videos. Someone mentioned Barrister and Mann and how these are some fine artisan soaps...legendary in both slickness and performance. Can you tell me is there anyone who doesn't appreciate slickness and performance??? I dip my toes in the pool of Barrister and Mann a bit...I purchase Bay Rum, because I think I will like the scent. And Seville is their top seller so we have to add that too but that line is so enchanting more purchases follow...and the scents...they are so intoxicating.
List of purchases below:
Barrister and Mann
Seville
Bay Rum
Cologne Russe
Le Grand Chypre
Lavanille
Reserve Classic
Reserve Cool
Reserve Lavender ( This is for wife. She has now ditched her cartridge razor and shaves her legs with a Godfather Viking...due to long blade. Of course)
Reserve Fern
Latha Oceana
Latha Taiga
and then Stirling Soaps
Executive Man
Sharp Dressed Man
and then Soap Commander
Courage
Fortitude
and then Sudsy and Soapery
Twice Mint
Almond and Vanilla
I promise you I am not counting $$$. No one in this world can make me do that. I also promise you I am not even thinking about that. As I complete further purchases of a Godfather Viking Razor, a Merkur 34G, Parker Variant, Rockwell 6s, a Feather AS D2, Timeless 0.68...I keep my word to you. Let's not dwell on math. It is not my strongest suit anymore.
I haven't slept a wink last night. Heavy steak dinner with a good wine from Whole Food (Angels and Cowboys) topped off with Greek Coffee and Chocolate Mouse cake. In my attempt to get completely healthy I eat only 1-2 meals per day consisting mostly of fruits and vegetables with steady Intermittent Fasting and skipping breakfast everyday. Since I am no longer used to this rich food It's been wreaking havoc with my stomach and I have been up for hours. It's past 6 AM. Soon the first rays of sun will hit the den and banish the night. I look like Hell, scruffy beard, bloodshot eyes but morning is almost here and a demonic grin flashes briefly across my face. Happiness...I have found you. For many years you have eluded me but no longer. I have trapped you. You see...the pleasant, warm, soapy, lathery thought has occurred to me: It's time to shave with my new Timeless Bronxe!!!
After all...this wet shaving...
IS THE CHEAPEST WAY TO SHAVE
Write, for example,'The night is shattered
and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.
Through nights like this one I held her in my arms
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.
She loved me sometimes, and I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.
etc...
"Pablo Neruda"
Poor Pablo is dead but there are many other sad souls there that keep that spirit alive. I am one of them. After all...tonight I can write the saddest lines...I can write for example that "yesterday I have joined a forum of Cheaters and Liars."
Why might you ask? Well...sit down friend and have a read.
This all started with our annual visit to Nisqually Wildlife center close to Olympia, WA. Our family has this tradition to welcome the New Year by taking a stroll on the Boardwalk and sometimes watch people who watch birds. People get fanatic over this stuff, especially bird watchers. This is the kind of place you will be asked for example whether the eagle perched up on that solitary tree is a "juvenile, 2 year old eagle."
Right...
So I am having a conversation with my brother in law as we are watching the snowy Mount Rainier's reflection on the Puget Sound waters and the conversation turns upon shaving creams. It's timely because in an effort to completely rid myself of all the toxins in my body I have thought several times that maybe my aerosol can of Gillette gel I shave with might not be the purest of things. I have been looking for a better, healthier option. My brother in law says:
"You really need to shave with a soap puck and a brush. It's so good for you and much healthier. But if you do that, then you might as well pick up a safety razor and shave the old school way...you know, the way our dads and grandpas used to."
Now I find this a bit intriguing in a weird John Wayne way...I don't know what my dad shaved with but I seemed to recall it was a Gillette. Each morning he would shave til his neck was red and then leave the blade and razor on a towel over the countertop to dry them up. Pretty cool huh? Watching him as a kid was fascinating though, as I enjoyed what seemed to be his ritual, especially his dabbing some aftershave on his face right after the shave. What fascinated me also, were the clean swaths the razor would leave on his face as it mowed down whiskers and shaving cream alike.
So far so good. And I wish the conversation had just stayed there without a single word added. But then my brother in law blurts out the biggest LIE of the century...
"BESIDES...IT"S THE CHEAPEST WAY TO SHAVE"
Now this got my attention. Healthy is fine, but healthy AND cheap...is super fine. I asked him how come and he says: "You get 100 Astra blades in amazon and they cost you what, like 10 bucks...and you can shave 3-4 times with a blade. How much are you paying for your cartridges? Now of course there's the initial cost of brush and razor but that's an INVESTMENT." (My brother in law sells for a living)
I didn't know exactly how much because my wife buys all the cartridges at Costco but I knew it wasn't 10 bucks. I had a general idea that my Mach 3 cartridges were pretty expensive. Needless to say this piqued my interest and I had to look it up. The John Wayne way of shaving right...Yeehaw!!!
It started innocently enough by watching a few YouTube videos of GeoFatboy, NickShaves, KevyShaves etc...just to see what I might be getting into. There was no denial it was healthier and I understood that whole "cartridge face abuse" theory and why. I did notice though, that these YouTube stars seemed to have an awful lot of gear they were shaving with but my mantra was..."Let's get a beginner razor like an Edwin Jaegger DE 89, a simple $8 brush in amazon (cheap) and a soap...let's go with Himalaya (Henry Cavendish) around $12. Now we are all set...that's like what $55? Ok fine add Astras 100 pack...that's like $65...and we can splurge on a wooden lather bowl for like $8. We are set for life for the low, low price of $73. I couldn't help but think that I could shave this cheaply for a couple of years. My dad was smiling at me from the distance, beckoning me with his soapy beard into the special club reserved for "real men who shave with safety razors."
But wait...what's this? There was a bit of advertisement in Amazon for a Viking Chieftain razor. Mind you, my DE89 hasn't even been shipped yet, but this Chieftain...ooohh, this looks nice. Deprived of any variety from years of shaving with a Cartridge razor, the words of advertisement appear forged in Viking Steel and the land of Valhalla...tagline..."PURE RAW MANLINESS."
Man...this stuff looks good. Oh well, I suppose I will be saving so much money that a second "TRAVEL RAZOR" won't hurt...$35 later my Viking Chieftain is in the shopping cart and is the first of the 2 to be delivered. Same day my brush and soap puck was delivered and it was time for my first shave. I put on the Astra on the Chieftain, made up some rather soupy lather and then proceeded to...cut myself a few times. Ah...F*** this. For a split second, my Mach 3 looked pretty enticing. But the masochist in me persevered...The next day, and the day after, and the day after that. My sink never thirsted for blood that much before. I launched into more YouTube videos, and concluded it was the brush's fault. Of course it was. Anyone who cut themselves like that didn't have the protection or slickness of proper lather. And what makes great lather? Expensive brushes...duh...
My next purchase was a Parker SilverTip Badger brush...another $64 or so. And for good measure let's add a Plissoft Monster to that cause why the F*** not and let's add more soap. F*** Henry Cavendish and his Himalaya soap, let's get good stuff.
My brother in law, that renegade, always comes to the rescue with this stuff..."You gotta get some Prorasso Green man...and the minty smell...so fresh and clean. Leaves my face as smooth as a baby and mountains of lather."
There goes the Prorasso Green in my shopping cart, and since it's same line, might as well add the Prorasso white and the red too. Armed to the teeth with these weapons we will leave no stone unturned. I make a pact with myself not to count the $$$ at this point because they are the last purchase anyways
While the Prorasso Green was being shipped I continue watching more YouTube videos. Someone mentioned Barrister and Mann and how these are some fine artisan soaps...legendary in both slickness and performance. Can you tell me is there anyone who doesn't appreciate slickness and performance??? I dip my toes in the pool of Barrister and Mann a bit...I purchase Bay Rum, because I think I will like the scent. And Seville is their top seller so we have to add that too but that line is so enchanting more purchases follow...and the scents...they are so intoxicating.
List of purchases below:
Barrister and Mann
Seville
Bay Rum
Cologne Russe
Le Grand Chypre
Lavanille
Reserve Classic
Reserve Cool
Reserve Lavender ( This is for wife. She has now ditched her cartridge razor and shaves her legs with a Godfather Viking...due to long blade. Of course)
Reserve Fern
Latha Oceana
Latha Taiga
and then Stirling Soaps
Executive Man
Sharp Dressed Man
and then Soap Commander
Courage
Fortitude
and then Sudsy and Soapery
Twice Mint
Almond and Vanilla
I promise you I am not counting $$$. No one in this world can make me do that. I also promise you I am not even thinking about that. As I complete further purchases of a Godfather Viking Razor, a Merkur 34G, Parker Variant, Rockwell 6s, a Feather AS D2, Timeless 0.68...I keep my word to you. Let's not dwell on math. It is not my strongest suit anymore.
I haven't slept a wink last night. Heavy steak dinner with a good wine from Whole Food (Angels and Cowboys) topped off with Greek Coffee and Chocolate Mouse cake. In my attempt to get completely healthy I eat only 1-2 meals per day consisting mostly of fruits and vegetables with steady Intermittent Fasting and skipping breakfast everyday. Since I am no longer used to this rich food It's been wreaking havoc with my stomach and I have been up for hours. It's past 6 AM. Soon the first rays of sun will hit the den and banish the night. I look like Hell, scruffy beard, bloodshot eyes but morning is almost here and a demonic grin flashes briefly across my face. Happiness...I have found you. For many years you have eluded me but no longer. I have trapped you. You see...the pleasant, warm, soapy, lathery thought has occurred to me: It's time to shave with my new Timeless Bronxe!!!
After all...this wet shaving...
IS THE CHEAPEST WAY TO SHAVE