Tons of talent Down Under.Shame I don't have any.
Go for it fella's.
I don't have any talent either and it didn't stop me
Give it a go mate.
Brush Ballads Contest #8 (Australia and New Zealand Only)
- Thread starter SRock
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I don't have any talent either and it didn't stop me
Give it a go mate.
I don't have any talent either and it didn't stop me
Give it a go mate.
+1 Spiny ( and all other Aussie/GSL members ) , give it go!!!!!
Support B&B and Mensbiz by entering !!!!
There's over 100 GSL members and only 4 have put themselves out there to be ridiculed so far ( some more than once
). Where the bloody hell are ya ????
The more the merrier !!!!!!
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I don't have any talent either and it didn't stop me
Give it a go mate.
+1
Some great entries so far.
The balad of the 09 butterscotch
Play the gordon lightfoot song while you read it
The legend lives on of the brush I have found
of the forum i call Badger Bladey
the 09 it is said, is right on ahead
get permission from your dear lady
its got silvertip hair - is immediately rare
and will leave your paypall dead empty
with double strength glue the knot will be true
I need another brush, surely
so the mods will provide, and our eyes open wide
as the brush skips through customs, no problems
the administrative woes are bigger than most
than even the mods were believing
our butterscotch yearns were more than returned
when the mods commissioned a new one
we thought it was legit when we heard about 'it'
could it be the new brush we'd been dreaming?
but no brush was found when the carnival came round
though prizes were many and plenty
every member new, as the contributors did, too
t'was due to more moderator scheming
well, the 08 came late and we're afraid we have to wait
for the new one to go hit the postman
customs was blamed, and much was defamed
though no one their order would rescind
when the grelots came and the straight users checked
shaving fellows, that was a great razor
with a terrible din, the essential came in
resisting that guy was a facer
then joel chimed in, we had zowadas coming in
the damascus put our wallets in peril
they were a delight, and worked out of sight
but for the 09, were only a herald
does anyone know where the butterscotch goes
when waiting turns minutes to hours
after 08 delay, I used it every day
there is no brush that I prefer
better than that and I wont be surprised
bring your 5 oclock shadow to slaughter
and all remains are clean faces and usernames
and a group of grinning monsieurs
though bay rum burns, alum stings
its lather you always rely on
this new brush it seems, is right from my dreams
which soap will i use it first on
we're lucky you know, they thought to bestow
us with such a sweet little forum
if you miss this brush though, or choose to say no
or pick up a different brush instead
before very long youll start a crusade
to use the bst forum
no brush you will find, though you bump 29 times
youre certainly not getting my one
The legend lives on of the brush I have found
of the forum we call Badger Bladey
our new brush it is said, is right on ahead
get ready for it to come early
[youtube]6U219P_zs7w[/youtube]
Great stuff gentlemen! My Aussie blood beats stronger in my veins when I read these great poems.
That was awesome Marcus.
- Thread starter
- #27
+1
Keep 'em coming fellas! We still have plenty of time. Lets see the other 100 or so Aussies get their entries in! And remember if you're in New Zealand, this one includes you as well!
Everyone knows New Zealanders are illiterate. 
- Thread starter
- #29
Everyone knows New Zealanders are illiterate.
Sounds like a challenge! Let's see your best NZ!!!
Everyone knows New Zealanders are illiterate.
ill get things started for my kiwi brothers:
baa baa, brush sheep, have you any knots?
vulfix... shavemac... we have lots
one that is badger, one that is boar
and one for me because I want some more
Fantastic
They're getting more epic all the time and it's only day one !
Pity this old brain's best efforts have been used up now with my (not ) so epic B(r)ush ballads above.
I'm down to limericks now
I once knew a comely young lassie
Who was classy and brilliant and sassie
Whether Badger or Boar
No one ever saw
What she used to shave her map of Tassie .
( Not sure if anyone outside of Aus/NZ will get this one, but that's probably a good thing
Oh boy there always has to be one
Tons of talent Down Under.
That goes for me too
I can't wait to see the entries.
- Thread starter
- #34
The brush from BST
there was movement in the knot, as I put my new brush down,
a hair from deep inside has gone astray.
I had bought it, bst - it was worth a thousand pound,
how had this single hair broken away?
from a scrupulous member, I had bought it from the Czar,
I had waited for the postman with delight.
perhaps had broken in its postage, it had come from quite afar,
perhaps a bumpy ride, its long haul flight.
ill try lathering, to test the knot inside my shaving cup,
its quality i soon shall try to know.
i hear nothing can compare when you go to lather up -
the reason I had forked out all the dough.
so I hope I have not paid for nothing more than only brand,
from the knot, again lets see what hair remains.
upon inspection firmly fixed is every single badger strand,
i scratch my head to try and rack my brains.
I really had expected loose another hair at least.
frustration with this brush I had so prized.
yet after all my testing, not another hair released,
a holy grail of brushes turned to grail that I despise.
what is going on here? again I question why,
look again at the hair that first had shed.
this was no badger hair, it had come from such as I,
the hair was mine, had fallen from my head!
I managed to keep the same rhymes. The original, for those unfamiliar...
There was movement at the station, for the word had passed around
That the colt from old Regret had got away,
And had joined the wild bush horses - he was worth a thousand pound,
So all the cracks had gathered to the fray.
All the tried and noted riders from the stations near and far
Had mustered at the homestead overnight,
For the bushmen love hard riding where the wild bush horses are,
And the stockhorse snuffs the battle with delight.
There was Harrison, who made his pile when Pardon won the cup,
The old man with his hair as white as snow;
But few could ride beside him when his blood was fairly up -
He would go wherever horse and man could go.
And Clancy of the Overflow came down to lend a hand,
No better horseman ever held the reins;
For never horse could throw him while the saddle girths would stand,
He learnt to ride while droving on the plains.
And one was there, a stripling on a small and weedy beast,
He was something like a racehorse undersized,
With a touch of Timor pony - three parts thoroughbred at least -
And such as are by mountain horsemen prized.
He was hard and tough and wiry - just the sort that won't say die -
There was courage in his quick impatient tread;
And he bore the badge of gameness in his bright and fiery eye,
And the proud and lofty carriage of his head.
That the colt from old Regret had got away,
And had joined the wild bush horses - he was worth a thousand pound,
So all the cracks had gathered to the fray.
All the tried and noted riders from the stations near and far
Had mustered at the homestead overnight,
For the bushmen love hard riding where the wild bush horses are,
And the stockhorse snuffs the battle with delight.
There was Harrison, who made his pile when Pardon won the cup,
The old man with his hair as white as snow;
But few could ride beside him when his blood was fairly up -
He would go wherever horse and man could go.
And Clancy of the Overflow came down to lend a hand,
No better horseman ever held the reins;
For never horse could throw him while the saddle girths would stand,
He learnt to ride while droving on the plains.
And one was there, a stripling on a small and weedy beast,
He was something like a racehorse undersized,
With a touch of Timor pony - three parts thoroughbred at least -
And such as are by mountain horsemen prized.
He was hard and tough and wiry - just the sort that won't say die -
There was courage in his quick impatient tread;
And he bore the badge of gameness in his bright and fiery eye,
And the proud and lofty carriage of his head.
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ill get things started for my kiwi brothers:
baa baa, brush sheep, have you any knots?
vulfix... shavemac... we have lots
one that is badger, one that is boar
and one for me because I want some more
hahaha. thats gold mate. I lol'd.
Through the red hot deserts I've searched
And have found beauty and mystery
But what I look for wasn't found
As in these sandy rocky plains
There's not a rustle or movement
of a Badger sound ...
So I packed my swag and billy
Looking for that hallowed ground
The places where Badgers roam.
I heard rumors they like our beaches
I imagined they loved the surf and foam
Disdain, agony and beauty abound
Alas the beach, no Badgers were found
As the seasons pass and we are left older
I often wonder whether I should of told her
My beautiful lady, my soft yet firm baby
You have slowly withered and have aged
Sometimes I wonder ... I think maybe ...
If I find that badger I can restore you
And bring you back to better times
Where we lathered in the sun together
And how you let me wash your hair ....
I wish that could of lasted forever
Such is life, it just isn't fair
So I continue my search around our land
While letting my beard grow down to the sand
As without you it's not the same
Where to find a Badger?
One that has your name ......
And have found beauty and mystery
But what I look for wasn't found
As in these sandy rocky plains
There's not a rustle or movement
of a Badger sound ...
So I packed my swag and billy
Looking for that hallowed ground
The places where Badgers roam.
I heard rumors they like our beaches
I imagined they loved the surf and foam
Disdain, agony and beauty abound
Alas the beach, no Badgers were found
As the seasons pass and we are left older
I often wonder whether I should of told her
My beautiful lady, my soft yet firm baby
You have slowly withered and have aged
Sometimes I wonder ... I think maybe ...
If I find that badger I can restore you
And bring you back to better times
Where we lathered in the sun together
And how you let me wash your hair ....
I wish that could of lasted forever
Such is life, it just isn't fair
So I continue my search around our land
While letting my beard grow down to the sand
As without you it's not the same
Where to find a Badger?
One that has your name ......
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one day to go!
Anybody who hasnt entered (or wants to enter again) is running out of time!
Anybody who hasnt entered (or wants to enter again) is running out of time!
Fellow shavers hear my story,
of a bond almost spiritual,
between me and my brush,
and my morning shaving ritual.
Using the brush was never a chore,
the time was all to brief,
surely I could use it some more,
so I used it to clean my teeth.
The brush felt so good in my hand,
I couldnt let it out of my sight,
so I took it to the kitchen,
and used it to spread my vegemite.
I thought it would last forever,
but I lost my pride and joy,
nothing could describe the horror,
my dog used it as a chew toy.
I was so distraught,
of that theres no mistakin,
it affected me so badly,
I cant eat any more bacon.
So now I need another brush,
can you help me please,
I havent shaved since the last one left,
And my beards down to my knees.
of a bond almost spiritual,
between me and my brush,
and my morning shaving ritual.
Using the brush was never a chore,
the time was all to brief,
surely I could use it some more,
so I used it to clean my teeth.
The brush felt so good in my hand,
I couldnt let it out of my sight,
so I took it to the kitchen,
and used it to spread my vegemite.
I thought it would last forever,
but I lost my pride and joy,
nothing could describe the horror,
my dog used it as a chew toy.
I was so distraught,
of that theres no mistakin,
it affected me so badly,
I cant eat any more bacon.
So now I need another brush,
can you help me please,
I havent shaved since the last one left,
And my beards down to my knees.
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- #40
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