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favorite resturant

Mark, that's as ridiculous as a one-legged man working in a brewery making hops....lord I apologize for that.

-Nick the cable guy
Hmmm, I smell a J[sub]oke[/sub]oTD thread brewing....

Here's my favorite quasi-family friendly joke:

How do you catch an elephant?

First you dig a big hole, and fill it with ash.

Next you carefully place some peas around the edge of the hole.

Then, when the elephant goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ash-hole.

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard coming from the bathroom.

A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there?" he yells.

"You're scaring my customers!"

"I'm just sitting here on the toilet," slurs the drunk, "and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my b&!!$."

The bartender opens the door, looks in, and says, "You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"
As long as we are hijacking the thread...

Mr. Bush

Rumsfeld is reporting to the Presidents' Cabinet. He says, "Three Brazilian soldiers were killed today in Iraq".

The President says "Oh, my God" as he buries his head in his hands.

The entire Cabinet is stunned. Usually George W. Bush shows no reaction whatsoever to these reports.

Just then Bush looks up and says "How many is a brazilian?".

A string walks in to a bar and orders a drink

Bartender says "we don't serve string in here, you need to leave"

The sting goes outside and he's all mad so he ties himself into a knot and frays himself at both ends

Goes back into the bar and orders another drink

bartender says "aren't you that string I just told to leave"

string says "no, i'm a frayed knot"
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