- Thread starter
- #301
According to my parents, my flick into existence happened at the Princess motel in Poughkeepsie, NY.
My mom graduated college Magna cum Baby.
Dignity and the Wet shave
- Thread starter BigAlVista
- Start date
My mom graduated college Magna cum Baby.
Umm...alluding to, although you might have been eluding the red light section to begin with
- Thread starter
- #303
Day 32: Rituals
It's 6:35am. Time for a quick status check:
I will say that my morning shave has taken on a bit of a mental health restorative quality since the surgery. When I skip a day, I feel a bit off. Even though yesterday's shave left me with some irritation, the thought of skipping today leaves me feeling anxious. It's as though the act of shaving sets the stage for a considered, organized and productive day.
I am generally not one for rituals, but I appreciate how they facilitate an acceptance for "big statements". We want to honor G-d? Go to a house of worship and sing/chant/recite songs or prayers. Want to tell someone they are your everything? Get down on a knee, propose, and marry them. Someone in your life passes on? Celebrate their memory through a wake, funeral, and/or memorial.
For me, the ritual of shaving is my way of telling myself "I am awake. I am healthy. I will have a productive day as a respected member of Society." While a well groomed person makes a statement to the world around them, it's just as much a sel-affirmation. I don't need others to see me as being ready for the day to come, but i need to see myself as ready.
So, how does the symbolism of the razor, blade and soap choices impact the ritual? If I shave with a Thorn, does that nean I'm going to be a bit of a pr**k today? If I shave with Grooming Department "Amare" with the Thorn, does that mean I'm looking for trouble?
Today, I'm feeling like the Roman Legion, ready to conquer the world!
It's 6:35am. Time for a quick status check:
- Can I get out of bed without needing to leverage furniture and other supporting devices to get my rear end out of bed? Check.
- Can I make it to the bathroom without a walker? Check.
- Can I relieve myself without a "patient care technician" assisting? Check.
- Can go up and down stairs by myself? Check.
- Can I feed myself? Check.
- Can I drive a car? Check.
- Can I turn my head relatively easily and without pain? Check again.
- Can I go for a hike in the woods and take long walks? Check.
- Can I lift anything greater than 10 pounds? Nope.
- Can I do yard work? Nope.
- Can I look down for more than a few minutes? Not really.
I will say that my morning shave has taken on a bit of a mental health restorative quality since the surgery. When I skip a day, I feel a bit off. Even though yesterday's shave left me with some irritation, the thought of skipping today leaves me feeling anxious. It's as though the act of shaving sets the stage for a considered, organized and productive day.
I am generally not one for rituals, but I appreciate how they facilitate an acceptance for "big statements". We want to honor G-d? Go to a house of worship and sing/chant/recite songs or prayers. Want to tell someone they are your everything? Get down on a knee, propose, and marry them. Someone in your life passes on? Celebrate their memory through a wake, funeral, and/or memorial.
For me, the ritual of shaving is my way of telling myself "I am awake. I am healthy. I will have a productive day as a respected member of Society." While a well groomed person makes a statement to the world around them, it's just as much a sel-affirmation. I don't need others to see me as being ready for the day to come, but i need to see myself as ready.
So, how does the symbolism of the razor, blade and soap choices impact the ritual? If I shave with a Thorn, does that nean I'm going to be a bit of a pr**k today? If I shave with Grooming Department "Amare" with the Thorn, does that mean I'm looking for trouble?
Today, I'm feeling like the Roman Legion, ready to conquer the world!
| Pre-Shave | BigAlVista's Shave Butter, PAA cube and Grooming Dept. Mojito Preshave |
| Soap/Cream | SV Manna DI Sicilia |
| Brush | SV 2-band |
| Scuttle | Pereira |
| Razor | LA Faulx + |
| Blade | Kai Captain Titan - Mild |
| 1st Pass Effectiveness | DFS |
| 2nd Pass Effectiveness | BBS- |
| Final Effectiveness | BBS, Required minimal buffing. |
| Quality | Given a bit of a rough shave yesterday, this was a good, clean shave. No red spots or weepers |
| Comfort | Smooth to buttery smooth. |
| Post Shave Irritation | Not bad. Skin is a bit bumpy still from yesterday. |
| Overall Efficiency | Excellent. DFS with one pass. |
| Razer, Blade and Cream Observations | Great razor, brush, blade, soap, creams and cologne combination. |
| Consistency with prior shave - Same setup | Haven't used this Razor and blade in a few weeks, but, based on my notes, it's very similar to the prior shave |
| Post Shave. | Thayers, AofS Bourbon balm |
| Cologne/Fragrance | SV Felce |
| Overall Shave Experience | Excellent shave. I want to say "elegant" |
| Comments | I think I'll stick with this razor and blade until the blade is done. |
- Thread starter
- #305
Day 33 – Spring Cleaning
I did not see it coming, but I am definitely feeling an urge to do some spring cleaning. For me, this is not just about taking old clothes to Good Will and cleaning out the Fridge. A proper spring cleaning entails getting the entire house in order. This year, that includes getting a new car, fixing the driveway, adding acid neutralizer to the water purifier, doing a check up of the AC unit, dealing with some electrical work (installing lights in the basement, wiring up the car charger, fixing some outdoor outlets, creating a dedicated circuit for the sump pump, moving a few circuits to the generator panel, fixing the disposal wiring and replacing a light switch), replacing the porch roof (which sprung a leak and is due for replacement), cleaning my office, cleaning out the basement, getting and setting up a new phone, and, getting healthy. My definition for spring cleaning is…broad.
Most of those tasks are in flight, but I must say that all this work feels a bit like a full time job. Today, the excavation company is dealing with the driveway (I hope). Tomorrow, I have the electrical work wrapping up and a doctors office visit. Friday is the cell phone. I’ll start with the office and basement cleanups next week, once I have one more week of healing under my belt.
As each task gets resolved, it’s as though a small weight is lifted from my shoulders. I’m hoping that by the time I’m ready to go back to work, I’ll be more or less set until next spring. That’s the idea, at least. I’m sure Murphy and has law will have something to say on the matter.
Relying on other people has made this difficult, particularly given my reliance on contractors, some of whom do not take pride in their work. The A/C contractor did not bring a ladder or refrigerant, nor did he think it was necessary to check coolant levels, nor flush the drain lines. Nor speak English. The auto dealer thought handing me a new car with a damaged rim and missing 3 keys was just fine. He didn’t actually bother to check. The excavation company can’t seem to find time to come to the house to do the repairs on the driveway. The contractor that did the disposal? He didn’t secure the wiring properly and I had to have my electrician fix the sloppy work. The list goes on.
Do people just not care about the services they perform? Has it always been that way or am I being selective with my memory? I almost wish everyone had a formal, Uber-like review that went with them from job to job. Is the guy fixing my gas furnace a 4.5 star HVAC mechanic or a struggling 1-star that is reading a manual as they work? I don’t want a review of the contractor’s firm, but the contractor themself. Should the HVAC contractor be required to speak English, or is it OK for him to speak to you in Russian, supported by Google Translate?
The excavation firm just called to postpone.
I don’t like micromanaging people, but recently, I feel I have little choice. I have become that guy that hangs around when the contractor is trying to work. It seems that when I do that, the results are better than if I leave the contractor to work independently. It’s unfortunate. I would much rather spend that time doing something else, like enjoying today’s shave of the day:
I did not see it coming, but I am definitely feeling an urge to do some spring cleaning. For me, this is not just about taking old clothes to Good Will and cleaning out the Fridge. A proper spring cleaning entails getting the entire house in order. This year, that includes getting a new car, fixing the driveway, adding acid neutralizer to the water purifier, doing a check up of the AC unit, dealing with some electrical work (installing lights in the basement, wiring up the car charger, fixing some outdoor outlets, creating a dedicated circuit for the sump pump, moving a few circuits to the generator panel, fixing the disposal wiring and replacing a light switch), replacing the porch roof (which sprung a leak and is due for replacement), cleaning my office, cleaning out the basement, getting and setting up a new phone, and, getting healthy. My definition for spring cleaning is…broad.
Most of those tasks are in flight, but I must say that all this work feels a bit like a full time job. Today, the excavation company is dealing with the driveway (I hope). Tomorrow, I have the electrical work wrapping up and a doctors office visit. Friday is the cell phone. I’ll start with the office and basement cleanups next week, once I have one more week of healing under my belt.
As each task gets resolved, it’s as though a small weight is lifted from my shoulders. I’m hoping that by the time I’m ready to go back to work, I’ll be more or less set until next spring. That’s the idea, at least. I’m sure Murphy and has law will have something to say on the matter.
Relying on other people has made this difficult, particularly given my reliance on contractors, some of whom do not take pride in their work. The A/C contractor did not bring a ladder or refrigerant, nor did he think it was necessary to check coolant levels, nor flush the drain lines. Nor speak English. The auto dealer thought handing me a new car with a damaged rim and missing 3 keys was just fine. He didn’t actually bother to check. The excavation company can’t seem to find time to come to the house to do the repairs on the driveway. The contractor that did the disposal? He didn’t secure the wiring properly and I had to have my electrician fix the sloppy work. The list goes on.
Do people just not care about the services they perform? Has it always been that way or am I being selective with my memory? I almost wish everyone had a formal, Uber-like review that went with them from job to job. Is the guy fixing my gas furnace a 4.5 star HVAC mechanic or a struggling 1-star that is reading a manual as they work? I don’t want a review of the contractor’s firm, but the contractor themself. Should the HVAC contractor be required to speak English, or is it OK for him to speak to you in Russian, supported by Google Translate?
The excavation firm just called to postpone.
I don’t like micromanaging people, but recently, I feel I have little choice. I have become that guy that hangs around when the contractor is trying to work. It seems that when I do that, the results are better than if I leave the contractor to work independently. It’s unfortunate. I would much rather spend that time doing something else, like enjoying today’s shave of the day:
| Pre-Shave | BigAlVista's Shave Butter, PAA cube and Grooming Dept. Mojito Pre-shave |
| Soap/Cream | PdP 63 |
| Brush | RV Ukrainian Bog Oak with D01 3-band |
| Scuttle | Pereira |
| Razor | LA Faulx + |
| Blade | Kai Captain Titan - Mild |
| 1st Pass Effectiveness | DFS |
| 2nd Pass Effectiveness | BBS |
| Final Effectiveness | BBS, Required minimal buffing. |
| Quality | Good clean shave |
| Comfort | Smooth to buttery smooth. |
| Post Shave Irritation | Negligible |
| Overall Efficiency | Excellent. DFS with one pass. |
| Razor, Blade and Cream Observations | Great razor, brush, blade, soap, creams and cologne combination. |
| Consistency with prior shave - Same setup | Haven't used this Razor and blade in a few weeks, but, based on my notes, it's very similar to the prior shave |
| Post Shave. | Thayers, AofS Bourbon balm |
| Cologne/Fragrance | SV Felce |
| Overall Shave Experience | Excellent shave. |
| Comments | Really enjoying the La Faulx and the new Brush. Thanks @Rudy Vey |
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Nope, you are 100% correct to feel like you're not being treated properly. Honestly at my age if someone showed up to do work on my HVAC and couldn't speak English I would simply send him on his way and not use the company again. If you receive a "CSI" request from the car manufacturer, fill it out honestly...the service industry gets away with anything they can because most people just shrug and figure "Whattya gonna do?". It's worldwide. Now if you do get great service...guess what? You go back to those people/company. Yet so many companies etc don't care because they figure there's always the next guy.
I'd still write a registered letter to the owner of the dealership detailing your unhappiness with how the car was presented to you. And maybe even do the same for the head of customer service Hyundai USA. If you don't push back they just keep providing mediocre service and I'm not accepting that anymore because I have a finite numbers of days left and I'm not settling for shoddy work, service or anything else.
It seems that way, our Pharmacy software vendor at one time was the cream of the crop, slowly they have gone down hill, moving Tech Support to India, and highly encouraging the use of a chat to obtain service. What was once an easy, quick experience is now hit or miss. They seem not to care when we bring it up to the US based tech support. We are about to change to their primary competition.
Excellent! Sometimes that's the ONLY way to wake them up.
They were bought out by some wing of Blackrock Holdings, that's when it started to go south. Deep pockets did not help them become better.
- Thread starter
- #311
Great advise everyone. Normally, that's what I do (vote with both my pen and my wallet)...However, much of the problematic work is being done through Sears Home Warranty (Cinch Home Services), where I don't get a say in the (low cost) provider they supply. I really need to take this up with them, or find a better whole home warrantee company.
My regular electrician is great. The excavation guy is a dear friend and in the end, he ultimately comes through and does good work, he just gives me the friends and family treatment, which is a double edged sword.
As to the dealership, they have made good on everything... New rim, the keys are in and they are providing me with concierge service and loaner cars for the inconvenience. They also wrote me a check to cover the cost of a L2 charger. Noting that this is a Hyundai dealership for a $450/month car (with nothing but the first month down), not a Mercedes dealership on a $1000/month car, I think I'm OK at this point.
By the end of next week, everything but the office and basement cleanup will be done...I hope...
It's not so much that I don't know how to deal with these situations, as much as it is the fact that I need to.
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- Thread starter
- #313
Day 34 – Out with the old, in with the new
My very first shaving brush was a “pure badger” brush from Hoffritz. It was a gift from my dad when I left for college. I don’t really use it much these days, but it’s still in fully functioning order- a testament to Hoffritz quality. I picked up my second brush about 10 years later from the Art of Shaving, before it was acquired by P&G. It was a beautiful 3-band Silvertip with a long 60mm loft against a 23mm knot.
I used that AofS knot for years and loved it. It was super soft and had enough backbone for the creams I was using from the mid-90s until recently. I loved the weight of that all nickel handle. I loved the touch of scritch it provided when face lathering. I loved the soft, cushioney feel of those super finely tipped bristles. That brush had a place in my heart.
Alas, about a year ago, it started shedding. At first, it was one hair, then two. A couple of months later, it was losing 5 to 10 hairs per shave, and making a mess with my croaps and creams. I reached out to P&G, but they were unable to help. I found a NIB one on ebay, for a crazy $250. No thank you. I reached out to brush Guru, Rudy Vey.
When I was a child, one of my favorite books was a “Fish Out of Water” by Helen Palmer Geisel and illustrated by P. D. Eastman. I loved that book and revered dear Mr. Carp, who made everything all right after a pet fish grew to kraken size following an overfeeding session by a young boy responsible for the fishes care. Soft spoken Mr. Carp knew just what to do and returned that fish to its proper size.
With a Shavemac 22mm D01 3-band and a bit of elbow grease, our own Mr. Carp (@Rudy Vey ) worked his magic and returned my brush to its proper form. Thank you, Rudy!
My very first shaving brush was a “pure badger” brush from Hoffritz. It was a gift from my dad when I left for college. I don’t really use it much these days, but it’s still in fully functioning order- a testament to Hoffritz quality. I picked up my second brush about 10 years later from the Art of Shaving, before it was acquired by P&G. It was a beautiful 3-band Silvertip with a long 60mm loft against a 23mm knot.
I used that AofS knot for years and loved it. It was super soft and had enough backbone for the creams I was using from the mid-90s until recently. I loved the weight of that all nickel handle. I loved the touch of scritch it provided when face lathering. I loved the soft, cushioney feel of those super finely tipped bristles. That brush had a place in my heart.
Alas, about a year ago, it started shedding. At first, it was one hair, then two. A couple of months later, it was losing 5 to 10 hairs per shave, and making a mess with my croaps and creams. I reached out to P&G, but they were unable to help. I found a NIB one on ebay, for a crazy $250. No thank you. I reached out to brush Guru, Rudy Vey.
When I was a child, one of my favorite books was a “Fish Out of Water” by Helen Palmer Geisel and illustrated by P. D. Eastman. I loved that book and revered dear Mr. Carp, who made everything all right after a pet fish grew to kraken size following an overfeeding session by a young boy responsible for the fishes care. Soft spoken Mr. Carp knew just what to do and returned that fish to its proper size.
With a Shavemac 22mm D01 3-band and a bit of elbow grease, our own Mr. Carp (@Rudy Vey ) worked his magic and returned my brush to its proper form. Thank you, Rudy!
| Pre-Shave | BigAlVista's Shave Butter, PAA cube and Grooming Dept. Mojito Pre-shave |
| Soap/Cream | A&E St. Barts |
| Brush | AofS nickel handle withShaveMac D01 3-band |
| Scuttle | Pereira |
| Razor | Razorock Superslant 2++ |
| Blade | Wizamet (3) |
| 1st Pass Effectiveness | DFS |
| 2nd Pass Effectiveness | BBS-- |
| Final Effectiveness | BBS-, Required some buffing. |
| Quality | Good clean shave |
| Comfort | Smooth. |
| Post Shave Irritation | Negligible |
| Overall Efficiency | Good, but this razor can use a sharper blade. Maybe a 7’oclock Black for the next one? |
| Razor, Blade and Cream Observations | Good razor, brush, blade, soap, creams and cologne combination. Excellent new knot on the AofS handle |
| Consistency with prior shave - Same setup | Similar to the prior shave, but a bit less efficient |
| Post Shave. | Thayers, AofS Bourbon balm |
| Cologne/Fragrance | Channel Allure |
| Overall Shave Experience | Excellent shave. |
| Comments | Thanks for the great repair job on this sentimental value brush, Rudy |
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- Thread starter
- #314
April 14, 2024 - Day 36 – The Joy of a Lazy Saturday – 2 Perspectives
It fascinates me how much differently men think than women. This can be obvious just from an analysis of how we plan the same shared day:
Her plan for the day:
1) Get up
2) Make the bed
3) Shower and shampoo with some “purple” shampoo for blonds
4) Brush teeth with a particular Crest product recommended by her dentist friend that lives in Warsaw
5) Clean the kitchen
6) Have me make us breakfast
7) Clean the kitchen again
8) Vacuum the house
9) Have me drive us to Shoprite
10) Buy: 1% and 2% milk, lettuce, string beans, Boars Head Swiss, Boars Head Ham, papaya, sour dough bread, sirloin that is on sale, yogurt, granola, napkins, paper towel, Lavazza coffee (if it’s on sale), avocados, onions, majol dates, eggs, and two donuts for my younger son
11) Have me drive home
12) Clean the freezer
13) Unpack
14) Have me make us some Assam Mangalam tea
15) Clean the kitchen
16) Cut my hair
17) Clean the kitchen
18) Have me reheat leftover pizza (mushroom and pepperoni from Dantes in New Canaan) for lunch
19) Set the table and eat
20) Clean the kitchen
21) Watch season 3 episode 6 of “Murder in Sweden” on the PBS Masterpiece network
22) Fix my hair
23) Clean the kitchen
24) Go for a 2 mile walk with me. Must maintain a pace of better than 20 minutes/mile
25) Shower and do makeup
26) Have me pack up my older son’s new Santa Fe with the table and chairs we bought them as a housewarming gift (my son left the car with us)
27) Have me drive my son's SUV to my son's new house and have me help him assemble the table. She’ll take her car so we can get home later
28) Take the kids and my older son’s Fiancée to some fancy restaurant in Greenwich
29) Come home
30) Clean the kitchen
31) Get ready for bed
32) Tell my other son and I not to mess the kitchen
33) Go to sleep by 9pm
My plan for the day:
1) Get up
2) Wash with whatever products are closest to my outreached arm
3) Shave (ser below)
4) Eat something
5) Keep my wife company
6) Chill for a bit
7) Eat something else
8) Do a bit of writing
9) Walk
10) Chill for a bit
11) Play chauffeur
12) Help my kid
13) Pay the dinner bill
14) Play chauffeur again
15) Chill
16) Go to bed
It's amazing how 1 chromosome can make such a difference. My day revolves around relaxing; hers revolves around chores. It’s good that I married my wife. Without her, I’d probably be sitting on an old cot, watching reruns of Babylon 5 and sucking on chicken bones.
Today's shave of the day:
It fascinates me how much differently men think than women. This can be obvious just from an analysis of how we plan the same shared day:
Her plan for the day:
1) Get up
2) Make the bed
3) Shower and shampoo with some “purple” shampoo for blonds
4) Brush teeth with a particular Crest product recommended by her dentist friend that lives in Warsaw
5) Clean the kitchen
6) Have me make us breakfast
7) Clean the kitchen again
8) Vacuum the house
9) Have me drive us to Shoprite
10) Buy: 1% and 2% milk, lettuce, string beans, Boars Head Swiss, Boars Head Ham, papaya, sour dough bread, sirloin that is on sale, yogurt, granola, napkins, paper towel, Lavazza coffee (if it’s on sale), avocados, onions, majol dates, eggs, and two donuts for my younger son
11) Have me drive home
12) Clean the freezer
13) Unpack
14) Have me make us some Assam Mangalam tea
15) Clean the kitchen
16) Cut my hair
17) Clean the kitchen
18) Have me reheat leftover pizza (mushroom and pepperoni from Dantes in New Canaan) for lunch
19) Set the table and eat
20) Clean the kitchen
21) Watch season 3 episode 6 of “Murder in Sweden” on the PBS Masterpiece network
22) Fix my hair
23) Clean the kitchen
24) Go for a 2 mile walk with me. Must maintain a pace of better than 20 minutes/mile
25) Shower and do makeup
26) Have me pack up my older son’s new Santa Fe with the table and chairs we bought them as a housewarming gift (my son left the car with us)
27) Have me drive my son's SUV to my son's new house and have me help him assemble the table. She’ll take her car so we can get home later
28) Take the kids and my older son’s Fiancée to some fancy restaurant in Greenwich
29) Come home
30) Clean the kitchen
31) Get ready for bed
32) Tell my other son and I not to mess the kitchen
33) Go to sleep by 9pm
My plan for the day:
1) Get up
2) Wash with whatever products are closest to my outreached arm
3) Shave (ser below)
4) Eat something
5) Keep my wife company
6) Chill for a bit
7) Eat something else
8) Do a bit of writing
9) Walk
10) Chill for a bit
11) Play chauffeur
12) Help my kid
13) Pay the dinner bill
14) Play chauffeur again
15) Chill
16) Go to bed
It's amazing how 1 chromosome can make such a difference. My day revolves around relaxing; hers revolves around chores. It’s good that I married my wife. Without her, I’d probably be sitting on an old cot, watching reruns of Babylon 5 and sucking on chicken bones.
Today's shave of the day:
| Pre-Shave | BigAlVista's Shave Butter, PAA cube and Grooming Dept. Mojito Pre-shave |
| Soap/Cream | AofS Bourbon |
| Brush | AP Shave Co. With G5A knot |
| Scuttle | Pereira |
| Razor | Razorock Superslant 2++ |
| Blade | Gillette 7o’clock Black |
| 1st Pass Effectiveness | DFS |
| 2nd Pass Effectiveness | BBS-- |
| Final Effectiveness | BBS. |
| Quality | Good clean shave |
| Comfort | Smooth enough but the blade was a bit rougher than the Wizamet. |
| Post Shave Irritation | Done irritation. More than I would have liked. |
| Overall Efficiency | Good enough, but not great |
| Razor, Blade and Cream Observations | Was a bit surprised that the 7’oclock Black was not much more efficient than the Wizamet blade. Need to try a couple of more shaves with this blade, but it may not be the right one for this razor head. |
| Consistency with prior shave - Same setup | First shave with this blade |
| Post Shave. | Thayers, AofS Bourbon balm |
| Cologne/Fragrance | SV 70th |
| Overall Shave Experience | Good shave. |
| Comments |
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Sounds exactly the same as my wife Mark.
- Thread starter
- #316
I get the feeling that you and I are not alone...
- Thread starter
- #317
Day 38 – Role Reversal
I consider myself lucky at 61. Of all my friends, I am one of a small few that still has both his parents alive and reasonably well. My mom is 81 and my dad is 88.
My parents have always had a joie de vivre and have spent much of their life balancing between what they needed to do and what they wanted. They were always socially active. They would see friends for dinner at least once per week, sometimes twice. My mom loved to entertain and her copy of Julia Child’s Mastery of French Cooking, Volume 1, is held together with tape and rubber bands from years of heavy use. Her dinner parties were legendary. One time she had a mentalist come to the house. Another time, she had a hypnotist. One time she had a costume party. There were multiple surprise parties. Though many of these events happened in the ‘70’s I do not remember there ever being a large bowl where the guests would toss their keys. Thank God.
They loved spending summers together, and the 8-weeks each year when my sister and I went away to sleep away camp was an opportunity for them to be kids themselves. They played tennis and golf together, went to the beach together, and my dad would do his absolute best imitation of Captain Bligh with my mother as reluctant crew on his 20ft. Corinthian Sailstar moored in Mamaroneck harbor.
I had mixed feelings about summer camp. Some summers were great, others not so much. In the summer coming into my ninth year, I was having a miserable time. When my parents came up for visiting day, I cried like a baby when it was time for them to leave. I remember the lump in my throat when they got into my dad’s Mercury Cougar XR-7 and pulled away.
Like most people, as they got older, they had their share of health issues. My mom is a survivor of breast cancer, and my dad has been a frequent flyer at Columbia Presbyterian’s Cardiology department, battles diabetes and high blood pressure, and has successfully dealt with a problematic meningioma. If it weren’t for my mom’s tenacious spirit and her unyielding drive to find and take advantage of the best hospitals and doctors money can buy, I wonder if either of them would still be with us. I would add that, as someone that recently had surgery, my mother is one of the best patient advocates and hospitalists around. She is not a doctor but knows more about infirmities and treatments than the average resident.
While my mom has done what she could to connect her friends to the right medical practitioners and facilities, time marches on. When my folks go for a meal at their club, my father is often the only man at the table, and the widows spend most of the time discussing their illnesses. This is not the active life that was at the center of my parents' existence for most of their married lives.
My dad has become easy going and quietly fatalistic in his elder years. He accepts that he can no longer play golf, go SCUBA diving, nor throw a ball around. As long as he has his wife and his kids, and a nice bottle of Malbec, he’s happy enough. Much to the chagrin of everyone who loves him and those he shares the road with, he let’s his youthful spirit free behind the wheel of his car. I wonder if the automobile will claim him before something more directly related to his health.
My folks live about 40 minutes away. It’s too far to see them every day, but we try to get together weekly. Yesterday, I got into my brand spanking new Ioniq6 (that now has all requisite keys and 4 new, undamaged wheels) and drove down to see them. My dad isn’t walking well, so he had me take his handicap rear-view mirror placard so we could park close to the clubhouse, where we would have lunch.
When I was a kid, my parents were friendly with almost everyone at their club and were at the center of everything. Now, not so much. When we walked in, the staff greeted us warmly, but the dining room was filled with unknown 40 to 60-year-olds, and their unruly, kids. A few tables away, one of my dad’s few remaining friends was celebrating his 92nd birthday with his family and we congratulated him. I went to high school with his daughter, who used to hang out with the older boys and smoked cigarettes by the school parking lot. She’s now a corporate attorney responsible for managing a pension fund. Her son had moved to Israel to study Talmud but had come home to celebrate his grandfather’s birthday. With the attack from Iran this past week, he may be staying here a while.
The three of us had a lovely lunch and talked about the usual topics: Health, Healthcare, getting old, my recovery, weddings, funerals, my kids, my sister's family, and problems with home technology. We also shared a piece of cake, courtesy of my dad’s 92-year-old friend, Gordon. It was a lovely lunch, despite some of the depressing conversation topics. We must have been at that table for two hours. We got back in the car, and I took them home.
We continued our chat for a bit, and I finally said I should get going. My mom had a sad look on her face: “Could you stay a bit longer?”
She said she needed me to put on my Geek Squad uniform. Usually, it’s my dad that wants a tech consult, but not this time. My mom wanted a lesson on how to scan a document and attach it to an email. We spent an hour working on it together. We discussed file managers, the difference between a JPEG and a PDF, how to initiate the import from the scanner and how to do so from the computer. I had my mom carefully write everything down and then I watched her as she practiced, using the written instructions as a guide. She seemed to get it (note that I got a phone call later that night where she told me it wasn’t working anymore. C’est la vie). As I put my jacket on to leave, I looked into her eyes, and I saw a reflection of myself as that 8-year-old watching his parents leave my summer camp. “Are you OK, Mom”?
“I’m lonely, honey”.
I gave her a big hug and we had a laugh about sleep away camp visiting day and role reversals. That seemed to make her feel better.
I told her to come visit during the week, but she said that she was afraid of getting in the car with my father driving, but that my father would not let her drive him anywhere. It looks like I will be coming back to visit them again later this week.
Today’s SOTD:
I consider myself lucky at 61. Of all my friends, I am one of a small few that still has both his parents alive and reasonably well. My mom is 81 and my dad is 88.
My parents have always had a joie de vivre and have spent much of their life balancing between what they needed to do and what they wanted. They were always socially active. They would see friends for dinner at least once per week, sometimes twice. My mom loved to entertain and her copy of Julia Child’s Mastery of French Cooking, Volume 1, is held together with tape and rubber bands from years of heavy use. Her dinner parties were legendary. One time she had a mentalist come to the house. Another time, she had a hypnotist. One time she had a costume party. There were multiple surprise parties. Though many of these events happened in the ‘70’s I do not remember there ever being a large bowl where the guests would toss their keys. Thank God.
They loved spending summers together, and the 8-weeks each year when my sister and I went away to sleep away camp was an opportunity for them to be kids themselves. They played tennis and golf together, went to the beach together, and my dad would do his absolute best imitation of Captain Bligh with my mother as reluctant crew on his 20ft. Corinthian Sailstar moored in Mamaroneck harbor.
I had mixed feelings about summer camp. Some summers were great, others not so much. In the summer coming into my ninth year, I was having a miserable time. When my parents came up for visiting day, I cried like a baby when it was time for them to leave. I remember the lump in my throat when they got into my dad’s Mercury Cougar XR-7 and pulled away.
Like most people, as they got older, they had their share of health issues. My mom is a survivor of breast cancer, and my dad has been a frequent flyer at Columbia Presbyterian’s Cardiology department, battles diabetes and high blood pressure, and has successfully dealt with a problematic meningioma. If it weren’t for my mom’s tenacious spirit and her unyielding drive to find and take advantage of the best hospitals and doctors money can buy, I wonder if either of them would still be with us. I would add that, as someone that recently had surgery, my mother is one of the best patient advocates and hospitalists around. She is not a doctor but knows more about infirmities and treatments than the average resident.
While my mom has done what she could to connect her friends to the right medical practitioners and facilities, time marches on. When my folks go for a meal at their club, my father is often the only man at the table, and the widows spend most of the time discussing their illnesses. This is not the active life that was at the center of my parents' existence for most of their married lives.
My dad has become easy going and quietly fatalistic in his elder years. He accepts that he can no longer play golf, go SCUBA diving, nor throw a ball around. As long as he has his wife and his kids, and a nice bottle of Malbec, he’s happy enough. Much to the chagrin of everyone who loves him and those he shares the road with, he let’s his youthful spirit free behind the wheel of his car. I wonder if the automobile will claim him before something more directly related to his health.
My folks live about 40 minutes away. It’s too far to see them every day, but we try to get together weekly. Yesterday, I got into my brand spanking new Ioniq6 (that now has all requisite keys and 4 new, undamaged wheels) and drove down to see them. My dad isn’t walking well, so he had me take his handicap rear-view mirror placard so we could park close to the clubhouse, where we would have lunch.
When I was a kid, my parents were friendly with almost everyone at their club and were at the center of everything. Now, not so much. When we walked in, the staff greeted us warmly, but the dining room was filled with unknown 40 to 60-year-olds, and their unruly, kids. A few tables away, one of my dad’s few remaining friends was celebrating his 92nd birthday with his family and we congratulated him. I went to high school with his daughter, who used to hang out with the older boys and smoked cigarettes by the school parking lot. She’s now a corporate attorney responsible for managing a pension fund. Her son had moved to Israel to study Talmud but had come home to celebrate his grandfather’s birthday. With the attack from Iran this past week, he may be staying here a while.
The three of us had a lovely lunch and talked about the usual topics: Health, Healthcare, getting old, my recovery, weddings, funerals, my kids, my sister's family, and problems with home technology. We also shared a piece of cake, courtesy of my dad’s 92-year-old friend, Gordon. It was a lovely lunch, despite some of the depressing conversation topics. We must have been at that table for two hours. We got back in the car, and I took them home.
We continued our chat for a bit, and I finally said I should get going. My mom had a sad look on her face: “Could you stay a bit longer?”
She said she needed me to put on my Geek Squad uniform. Usually, it’s my dad that wants a tech consult, but not this time. My mom wanted a lesson on how to scan a document and attach it to an email. We spent an hour working on it together. We discussed file managers, the difference between a JPEG and a PDF, how to initiate the import from the scanner and how to do so from the computer. I had my mom carefully write everything down and then I watched her as she practiced, using the written instructions as a guide. She seemed to get it (note that I got a phone call later that night where she told me it wasn’t working anymore. C’est la vie). As I put my jacket on to leave, I looked into her eyes, and I saw a reflection of myself as that 8-year-old watching his parents leave my summer camp. “Are you OK, Mom”?
“I’m lonely, honey”.
I gave her a big hug and we had a laugh about sleep away camp visiting day and role reversals. That seemed to make her feel better.
I told her to come visit during the week, but she said that she was afraid of getting in the car with my father driving, but that my father would not let her drive him anywhere. It looks like I will be coming back to visit them again later this week.
Today’s SOTD:
| Pre-Shave | BigAlVista's Shave Butter, PAA cube and Grooming Dept. Mojito Pre-shave |
| Soap/Cream | D. R. Harris Arlington |
| Brush | Barbermatic with Boti knot |
| Scuttle | Pereira |
| Razor | Razorock Superslant 2++ |
| Blade | Gillette 7o’clock Black |
| 1st Pass Effectiveness | DFS |
| 2nd Pass Effectiveness | BBS-- |
| Final Effectiveness | BBS- |
| Quality | Expecting red spots later today |
| Comfort | Still rough. Thinking the 2++ plate may be a bit aggressive |
| Post Shave Irritation | Too much irritation. I would not be surprised if bumps come up on my face later. |
| Overall Efficiency | The efficiency is not commensurate with the irritation. |
| Razor, Blade and Cream Observations | Not great all around. Blade is too aggressive for this aggressive late. The D. R. Harris soap is lovely, but not slick enough, nor cushiony enough for this razor/blade combo. |
| Consistency with prior shave - Same setup | Similar to prior shave with this blade |
| Post Shave. | Thayers, AofS Bourbon balm |
| Cologne/Fragrance | Burberry Brit |
| Overall Shave Experience | Not great. |
| Comments | Not loving the 2++ plate so far having tried several shaves with two different blades |
Very poignant and nicely written... thanx for sharing. My mother and my wife's father are both in their 90's and they both still drive, which I personally do not agree with. However as far as my mom is concerned, my brother tends got take her where she needs to go...most of the time.
I enjoyed your writing about your parents..... I'm sure our kids will be going through similar things as we age. Just a few years ago now, we were discussing our 50th anniversary....Our son said... Dad, do you think you'll actually make it to your 50th? I had let my weight get out of control and had to use a cane to get around.
Not a direct result, but a contributing factor, his comment helped motivate me to do something about my declining health. I started exercising and changed my eating life style and began the arduous process of weight loss. This was in January of 2022. As of this morning, I'm 7 pounds away from what I believe will be my ideal weight, but I won't know for sure. I'll know when I get there if that's it and I can begin the maintenance program. Our 50th is coming up this June. It looks like I'll make it.
I think you might find the L1++OC base plate to provide a more mild shave you'll enjoy. I found that a Kai blade made it quite nice, but it also worked well with Perma-Sharp.
I'm "only" 70. I started delivering food last year in August. The thing that shocked me the most is how my driving skills had diminished....I'm sure staying mostly housebound for almost 2 years during Covid was a contributing factor, but there is no doubt, age is the biggest culprit.
It took about a month or so before I was competent to be out there, driving 12 hours a day. I used to drive over 70K miles a year when I was in sales. I'm not back to that level, of course. In fact, I realized very quickly. I can't have any distractions. I don't listen to the radio or play a CD, etc. any more. I have to give driving my full attention.
Still, I know there will come a day when I have to cease getting behind the wheel. I don't look forward to it, but I would like to think I'll recognize that time instead of having one of our sons (or my wife) informing me I'm a danger to myself and others when I drive.
Getting older isn't for the weak....
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