Anyone else been told not to say "Merry Christmas"?

[professorchaos]

When did people become so easy to offend? Wishing someone Merry Christmas is not like wishing doom on them, a pox on their descendants and plague on their countrymen.

I was raised a Christian and a gentleman. So when someone says Happy Hanukkah to me, I reply with Happy Hanukkah and go about my business. I expect the same when I say or write Merry Christmas.

 

[wilsonent]

I didn't read all the posts, so forgive me if this has been mentioned.

I just tell everyone happy Festivus. Then I challenge them to feats of strength, and follow that up with the airing of grievences.

But seriously folks, I work with a few Hindu doctors and they wish people Merry Christmas all the time. Lots of things to get upset about these days, I will keep my anger aimed elsewhere thank you very much.

Peace.

 

[English]

My saying they need to respect that is referring to the teacher trying to force a kid to do something he has been taught is wrong. I don't see how that is effecting their customs. I had teachers do the same thing to me. I did not want to be involved. That in no way prevents them from enjoying their customs.

"You don't see how that is effecting their customs". Really.

You don't think that by your child not participating that in itself is you making a statement through your child. I'm sure you do understand that fully. I'm sure the teachers at your childs school understand that fully as well.

I think the solution is obvious. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. You know these old proverbs are based on centuries of understanding and commonsense.

 

[blackfoot]

"You don't see how that is effecting their customs". Really.

You don't think that by your child not participating that in itself is you making a statement through your child. I'm sure you do understand that fully. I'm sure the teachers at your childs school understand that fully as well.

I think the solution is obvious. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. You know these old proverbs are based on centuries of understanding and commonsense.

So, we should participate in customs we do not approve of because most of the people around us are? You surely can not seriously mean that. I have deleted about five things that I want to say here because I don't want to contribute to anything I will regret. But seriously?

 

[richmondesi]

Personally, I don't think children should be forced to take a stand against customs that you don't approve of. I let my kids do a lot of stuff that I would refrain from because they don't understand the issues fully, and I want them to grow up to be able to make their own decisions. When asked, I offer my opinions, but my 6 year old doesn't need to be in the middle of those kinds of battles IMO.

Fwiw, I'm not passing judgment on those who do (my parents were that way) force the kids to be at odds with the norms; it's just not my way of doing things

 

[blackfoot]

Personally, I don't think children should be forced to take a stand against customs that you don't approve of. I let my kids do a lot of stuff that I would refrain from because they don't understand the issues fully, and I want them to grow up to be able to make their own decisions. When asked, I offer my opinions, but my 6 year old doesn't need to be in the middle of those kinds of battles IMO.

Fwiw, I'm not passing judgment on those who do (my parents were that way) force the kids to be at odds with the norms; it's just not my way of doing things

I was not forced. My parents raised me with the ideals they believed in and I willingly took the same stand. I had t have their guidance because obviously didn't the knowledge they did or do.

 

[richmondesi]

I was not forced. My parents raised me with the ideals they believed in and I willingly took the same stand. I had t have their guidance because obviously didn't the knowledge they did or do.

My question is this: When did their beliefs become yours though? That is my biggest problem with the idea. I want my kids taking stands for their beliefs, not mine. Like I said, Blake, I'm not passing judgment. I was raised a lot like you I'm guessing, but I won't make my kids do what I had to do. That's all I'm saying

 

[blackfoot]

My question is this: When did their beliefs become yours though? That is my biggest problem with the idea. I want my kids taking stands for their beliefs, not mine. Like I said, Blake, I'm not passing judgment. I was raised a lot like you I'm guessing, but I won't make my kids do what I had to do. That's all I'm saying

I understand what you are saying. For me, I don't know if there is a clear answer. If your parents told you it was wrong to lie,at what point is this your opinion and not what you have been told. All parents do this, whether they intend to or not. I know in the case of the little boy that I initially refered to, that is how his parents found out. He was so upset at being pressured by someone, who he was taught to obey, to do something he felt was wrong. He came to his parents and asked them what they thought. Mind you, this kid is only seven. I would say this was how he felt, not what his parents were making him do.

 

[tlanning]

My wife is Jewish and I'm Methodist--

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays B&B--how hard is that?

 

[richmondesi]

I understand what you are saying. For me, I don't know if there is a clear answer. If your parents told you it was wrong to lie,at what point is this your opinion and not what you have been told. All parents do this, whether they intend to or not. I know in the case of the little boy that I initially refered to, that is how his parents found out. He was so upset at being pressured by someone, who he was taught to obey, to do something he felt was wrong. He came to his parents and asked them what they thought. Mind you, this kid is only seven. I would say this was how he felt, not what his parents were making him do.

There are basic truths that don't relate to politics, religion, etc. that I instill in the kiddos. Don't lie, don't kill, etc. are among those. I've even introduced them to religion as well. In fact, they go with me to services virtually every time I go. However, when they say they don't want to, I don't force the issue. I don't strictly impose my religious views on them (and hope not to) because they aren't old enough to understand the "why" behind it. Besides that, I want them to learn the "why" because doing stuff because "I said so" didn't work well for me. At all .

Specific to the little 7 year old, I'm sure that if every kiddo around was doing something that he considered "wrong", it probably wasn't his/her judgment on the matter. I'm a fairly strict person when it comes to my views, but I don't impose the same limitations on my children. I don't think it's fair to them. When they get significantly older, I'll work on the "why" and hope that they follow my example. 7 years old is too you for that, IMHO

 

[blackfoot]

There are basic truths that don't relate to politics, religion, etc. that I instill in the kiddos. Don't lie, don't kill, etc. are among those. I've even introduced them to religion as well. In fact, they go with me to services virtually every time I go. However, when they say they don't want to, I don't force the issue. I don't strictly impose my religious views on them (and hope not to) because they aren't old enough to understand the "why" behind it. Besides that, I want them to learn the "why" because doing stuff because "I said so" didn't work well for me. At all .

Specific to the little 7 year old, I'm sure that if every kiddo around was doing something that he considered "wrong", it probably wasn't his/her judgment on the matter. I'm a fairly strict person when it comes to my views, but I don't impose the same limitations on my children. I don't think it's fair to them. When they get significantly older, I'll work on the "why" and hope that they follow my example. 7 years old is too you for that, IMHO

I have to disagree on one major point. By the time I was in school, I already understood the why. Understanding the how is where it gets tricky sometimes.

I won't continue on this line since it is way off topic. My initial point was that others have no right to try to force us to conform and we have no right to expect them to conform to us.

 

[richmondesi]

I have to disagree on one major point. By the time I was in school, I already understood the why. Understanding the how is where it gets tricky sometimes.

I won't continue on this line since it is way off topic. My initial point was that others have no right to try to force us to conform and we have no right to expect them to conform to us.

And my point is that "because my parents said so" isn't good enough for matters of religion, politics, etc. Just my opinion

 

[ogopogo]

I have a friend whose kid was told, "It's not a Christmas tree. It is a holiday tree." They then pressured him into making a candy cane to hang on the tree. This definitely crosses the line.

I know in the case of the little boy that I initially refered to, that is how his parents found out. He was so upset at being pressured by someone, who he was taught to obey, to do something he felt was wrong.

Out of curiosity, what kind of beliefs are are instill on 7 year old to make him think that hanging a candy cane on a tree is so "wrong"? This act in itself is not a Christian act, it's not even a religious act. So what was this kid taught to make him so upset at the prospect?

 

[blackfoot]

Out of curiosity, what kind of beliefs are are instill on 7 year old to make him think that hanging a candy cane on a tree is so "wrong"? This act in itself is not a Christian act, it's not even a religious act. So what was this kid taught to make him so upset at the prospect?

That would open up an entire can of worms this thread is not prepared to deal with.

 

[ogopogo]

That would open up an entire can of worms this thread is not prepared to deal with.

OK, that's fair. I do feel sorry for the kid... being put in a situation so upsetting to him over such a trivial thing, it's not like he was asked to pray or something. His parents did him a disservice by teaching him whatever it was that they taught him. And of course the teacher didn't help matters by pressuring him.

 

[WhosYerBob]

I used to voluntarily say Happy Holidays - until people started demanding that I say it. Now I say Merry Christmas whether they like it or not.

 

[Obsessed]

When in Rome, do as the Roman do. Also watch your back. It is your choice as to where you choose to live and I don't think you can expect local custom and culture to change or to respect your beliefs. Why should they. Because it makes you happy. Life just isn't like that.

Would you clarify this, please?

 

[Kevan]

I say happy holidays in order to **** off the people that get worked up about people not saying "merry christmas"

Seriously though...I say Merry Christmas most of the time, and happy holidays if I don't know the person. I'm agnostic so it's no big deal either way.

 

[OldSchoolYoungin]

I say Merry Christmas to most and Happy Chanukah to persons that visually appear to be Jewish.

Don't like it? Too bad. There's nothing malicious behind my greetings. If you take offense to it, that sounds like a personal problem to me...

 

[Woodrobin]

Well, I read Raisindot's "When in Rome . . ." and it reminded me of an old forum post I read one day on my way to the Forum:

"What's this empire coming to? Now they want us to stop greeting people with, `Io, Saturnalia.' `We have all these different cultures in Rome,' they tell us. `We shouldn't offend anyone,' they tell us. `We should be inclusive. We've got the barbarians from the north with their tree decorations and their fire rituals, and the weirdos from Gaul cutting mistletoe with a golden sickle, and the Mithraists, the Zoroastrians, the Isis cults and, of course, those characters that hang out in the catacombs.' `Hail, winter,' we're supposed to say. I ask you, what next? We lose the feast? We stop the solstice parties? No more honoring Ops, goddess of abundance?

I was buying some candles and greenery down by the Forum the other day and there's old Macrobius with some Visigoth chick, and she goes, `Good yule.' So I go, `Hey, in this country, we say, "Io, Saturnalia." Maybe you should go back from where you came from.' Then Macrobius goes, `She can't; she's a slave.' Whatever. At this time of year, the Visigoths sacrifice a pig and burn a special log which they then dance around instead of acting like normal people and going to the temple of Saturn.

I swear, I was at this party over at Septima Commodia's house the other day--she always has a Saturnalia party--anyway, she decorated the place with prickly green leaves. `It's holly,' she said, `the latest fashion from Britannia. They all do it over in Londinium.'

It gets worse. She had this statue of some goddess from Ultima Thule or somewhere--name of Frigga--sitting right there on the dining room mensa. I mean, this is darn near blasphemous. I'd be scared of what the lares and penates would do if I put that thing in my house. But Septima Commidia just said, `Oh, get over it. We're cosmopolitan around here.'

Cosmopolitan; that's what they call it. Well, by Jupiter, I live in Latium, I'm a Roman and this empire was founded on the principle that the gods, our gods, must be honored at the appropriate time and in the appropriate way. None of this foreign heretical nonsense or these strange customs from Germania or Hibernia or Palestine. I say, `Io, Saturnalia,' and if you don't like it, you can leave."