YAGT: Is she a serial flirt? Or is she into me?

[KarthVader]

So, while at a wedding on Dec. 26, I met a girl that was super flirty and made some comments that caught me off guard.

The story:

I asked to look at my date's ring, because it had an interesting design. I looked at it, and gave it back to her. She placed it on her right ring finger. The Flirty Girl then asked us (my date and I) if we were engaged. We both replied no. Later, after a bit of dancing and drinking, Flirty Girl came up to me and asked how long my date and I had been together. I said that we weren't dating, just friends. I then asked her how long her and her date (my friend from high school) had been dating. She assured me, multiple times, that she and my friend from high school were not dating and just friends.

Then, after some more dancing and drinking, I took a break with my date and we were just chatting when Flirty Girl grabbed a seat next to me and started talking to my date about her dress and jewelry. They did what girls do: exchanged pleasantries about each others outfits and makeup, yadda yadda yadda. Then Flirty Girl made a comment about how great of a dancer I am. I thanked her, but she went on about how good I must be at ball room and swing dancing. At this point, since I haven't been hit on in ages, much less had any girl flirt with me, I was skeptical and cautious but lightly flirted back. Now, here's the bombshell: She's white and I'm Indian (from India). According to her, interracial couples are the best thing since sliced bread . We (my date, Flirty Girl and I) talked about other things, making small talk and telling jokes.

My date and I decided to leave the wedding and go to a party. My date suggested that I ask Flirty Girl for her number, so I did just that. Flirty Girl, however, would only give me her name to add on Facebook. I gave her my phone, to try again, but she gave me her name on a piece of paper.

On the way to the other party, my date was shocked to find out I didn't get any digits, just a name on a piece of paper.

I friended her and sent her a message wishing her a happy new year and asking about her NYE plans. She replied back asking about mine. I plan on replying in a couple days when I get back to Michigan.

So, was Flirty Girl just a serial flirt? With all that flirting and making sure that my date and I weren't exclusive, what was the point of giving me her name and not her number? I think that women, especially my age (early 20s), don't date like people used to. I'm starting to wonder if I should even bother messaging her.

What do ye gentlemen and ladies think?

 

[richmondesi]

Sounds weird to me... Could be she wants to date, but wants to see what kind of weird stuff you might be into on FB. Once she finds you're a member of B&B's facebook group, you're doomed

Seriously, I have no idea what she's up to, but I'm glad I'm married and out of the dating scene

 

[luvmysuper]

In my opinion - No matter what she said in person - she didn't give you a number.
There is a reason she didn't.
Go ahead, think of any of the possible ones, and there are plenty.
Now, any reason for not giving you a way to contact her is a reason not to get involved with her.
Good luck my friend.

 

[airplanedoc]

What did your date think? She was there, and in my experience, women are generally a much better read of if another woman is into a guy (read you).

 

[chainfire]

Seriously, I have no idea what she's up to, but I'm glad I'm married and out of the dating scene

You and me both.

FWIW, I'd personally steer clear of getting too involved with this girl - sounds like she may have just been having some fun.

 

[Townyj]

If you think she is worth the hassle then go for it i say.. Everyone uses FB nowadays to converse, give it a crack if your keen. Some girls just like the attention and she sounded like she was having a little fun being flirty and all. Just add her and be friendly, cant go wrong with more girl "friends"

 

[TimmyBoston]

She's just not that into you. Sorry.

 

[luvmysuper]

If you think she is worth the hassle then go for it i say.. Everyone uses FB nowadays to converse, give it a crack if your keen. Some girls just like the attention and she sounded like she was having a little fun being flirty and all. Just add her and be friendly, cant go wrong with more girl "friends"

That's what Michael Douglas said too.

 

[Obsessed]

Why not send her another FB message and see what happens? Maybe she's into you, and if not, it's no skin off your nose. Don't over think it (it's not shaving).

 

[ek.310]

yes..I agree..I'm happily married with kids..GL
ek.310

 

[Antique Hoosier]

Weddings bring out the Ga-Ga factor in women. Either you strike while the irons hot or you take a pass my friend.

 

[auk1124]

She's attempting to string you along as fall-back material while she keeps her options open. Forget her and find one that is seriously interested in you.

And +a zillion, thank God I am not dating any more.

 

[Baloosh]

She decided to play it safe at the end of the night and gave you the Facebook brush-off. Maybe she met another guy between the time you last talked and you decided to leave?

I agree with Hoosier -- you missed your window, but doesn't sound like you missed much. Just rest comfortably in the knowledge that you can still get women to flirt with you!

 

[KarthVader]

I am glad I didn't get her number; I do think she might be 8 kinds of crazy. I'll keep her on the back burner, but not a priority.

What did your date think? She was there, and in my experience, women are generally a much better read of if another woman is into a guy (read you).

My date was wondering what the hell was wrong with Flirty Girl. Apparently, I'm a catch (news to me). My date intimated that if she wasn't living out state, we would be dating long term.

Oh well, back to the lab.

 

[KarthVader]

Why not send her another FB message and see what happens? Maybe she's into you, and if not, it's no skin off your nose. Don't over think it (it's not shaving).

I did send her a message and she replied the same day, so I guess that's a good sign. But again, I think she might have some screws lose.

 

[thunderball]

Hmmm....seems too early to really tell either way. I don't find it that surprising that she gave you her Facebook name instead of her phone number, pretty common these days I think. She may just have been playing it safe and, as she doesn't really know you yet, didn't want to give out her home phone number right away. I figure that if she wasn't in to you at all she would have given you a fake number or Facebook name. Of course I don't know her (she may be just a nutty little ho for all we know...heheh, rhyming is cool) but I certainly wouldn't write a girl off simply because she gave me a Facebook add instead of her number. Most young people use Facebook more than the phone anyway these days...

So many factors involved...weddings make chicks a bit squirrelly, there was probably alcohol involved, first time meeting, etc., etc. I say if you're interested just keep it cool and casual over Facebook for a bit and you'll soon get a feel for what she's really thinking. If you're getting sort of vague, one-word replies then it's pretty obvious she ain't that into you...on the other hand if she's writing you novels and asking to meet up again then it sounds like it might be on. Ya just never knows!

With all that said, I'm also glad my dating (various women) days are over.

 

[Sue]

I did send her a message and she replied the same day, so I guess that's a good sign. But again, I think she might have some screws lose.

Trust your instinct. What quality will she add to your life if she's a flake? That she flirted with you is a nice ego boost but if you think she has a screw loose, it would probably be best to just keep going.

Don't meet anywhere for a bowl of rabbit stew .
Sue

 

[thunderball]

Trust your instinct. What quality will she add to your life if she's a flake? That she flirted with you is a nice ego boost but if you think she has a screw loose, it would probably be best to just keep going.

Don't meet anywhere for a bowl of rabbit stew .
Sue

Also very good advice! I didn't catch that part on my first read-through. If she seems a bit nutty to you it probably means one of two things:

a) she was just nervous and/or drunk

b) she's far, far nuttier than you could ever imagine.

 

[KarthVader]

Trust your instinct. What quality will she add to your life if she's a flake? That she flirted with you is a nice ego boost but if you think she has a screw loose, it would probably be best to just keep going.

Don't meet anywhere for a bowl of rabbit stew .
Sue

Sue, you just made my night! I only think she might be a little crazy because she talked about some slightly weird stuff. Now that I look back at the events, I think she was just nervous, oh and totally enamored with my magnificence

 

[WhosYerBob]

That's what Michael Douglas said too.

The image you posted gave me chills.

I had an ex-girlfriend from hell that once threatened to kill me because she was so possessive. I quickly put an end to that relationship, but she stalked me for many years afterward.