Jovan Musk
The WORST Cologne You've Owned / Smelled?
- Thread starter Zig the Pirate
- Start date
Sooo true!! My dad literally could only wear Aramis. ANYTHING else he tried smelled like a chemical factory!That's how my wife reacted when I tried Roam.
Definitely does NOT mesh with my body chemistry.
Grey Flannel,couldn't get past the opening and Perry Ellis 360 red caused me to break out in a rash.
Halston z14 and Cremo bourbon-vanilla. Just like the veg, -went straight to the trash. The
Cremo reserve disteller’s blend smells great.
Cremo reserve disteller’s blend smells great.
Toss up between Pinaud Virgin Island Bay Rum, which smells like someone fell into the punch bowl at the office Christmas party, and Osage Rub which smells like a cross between BenGay rub and burning jet fuel.
DS & Durga Burning Barbershop is gross. AND $100+/50ml. I own it and hate it. 
Clubman The Veg also makes me want to hurl. It is cheap at least.
Clubman The Veg also makes me want to hurl. It is cheap at least.
When I was kid in late 50’s there was something sold a Bobs Magic Shop in North Hollyweird, CA.
It was Apple Blossim Perfume, it stunk. We would dump five or six drops in hall at School early am.
No one want to be in hall from smell, janiotor nightmear.
It was Apple Blossim Perfume, it stunk. We would dump five or six drops in hall at School early am.
No one want to be in hall from smell, janiotor nightmear.
Owen Bawn
Garden party cupcake scented
I might be one of the biggest fan boys of Dunhill, Floris, and Acqua di Parma on this site, but each of them have produced at least one fragrance that I can't stomach.
Dunhill Edition. This one was really popular for over 20 years but I think it smells like pickled okra.
Floris Jermyn St. A posh EdP with a strong juniper/gin note. I drank well in excess of a pint of gin, straight, out of a cracked tea cup one hot Sunday afternoon when I was 16. Need I say more?
Acqua di Parma Chinotto di Liguria. Chinotto is a citrus fruit that Italians enjoy as a carbonated soda pop. I don't like it. I guess I don't really like any frags based on food or drink. No gourmand for me. Although the idea of a goat vindaloo perfume is intriguing...
Dunhill Edition. This one was really popular for over 20 years but I think it smells like pickled okra.
Floris Jermyn St. A posh EdP with a strong juniper/gin note. I drank well in excess of a pint of gin, straight, out of a cracked tea cup one hot Sunday afternoon when I was 16. Need I say more?
Acqua di Parma Chinotto di Liguria. Chinotto is a citrus fruit that Italians enjoy as a carbonated soda pop. I don't like it. I guess I don't really like any frags based on food or drink. No gourmand for me. Although the idea of a goat vindaloo perfume is intriguing...
Yatagan by Caron is simply awful. I love several other Caron fragrances, but this one takes the cake. I read somewhere that's supposed to capture the smell of a warrior returning home from battle on horseback smelling of sweat, leather, dirt, **** or whatever. Simply awful. Try it!
Are you thinking of Barrister & Mann's Leviathan?
I'm only semi joking. Leviathan, to me, smells like the scratched up Oldsmobile my nanny used to drive in the late eighties: a decade of cigarettes and spilled coffee atop a base of one of those pine tree-shaped air "fresheners." Ughhh.
Joop. As soon as I put it on it had to be washed off. Even after the shower I could still smell it.
Jade East, say no more.
Pinaud bay rum. I love bay rum but this thing seems like someone boiled 1kg of pure clove in water and put it in a bottle with alcohol.
Clove clove and more clove. It doesn’t even smell like a fragrance, it’s like liquid food to me.
I can’t imagine coming out of the bathroom smelling like that.
Clove clove and more clove. It doesn’t even smell like a fragrance, it’s like liquid food to me.
I can’t imagine coming out of the bathroom smelling like that.
The first instant that I smelled
I realized that I had no idea of whether or not
Windex Glass Cleaner
also came in a Lime scented variety.
CLUBMAN LIME SEC COLOGNE
I realized that I had no idea of whether or not
Windex Glass Cleaner
also came in a Lime scented variety.
Sterling Spice - just not my cup of tea
I wore this stuff on a hot day and I swear I smelled like a baked ham!
For me, most vetiver scents don't react with my body correctly. I end up smelling like vegetable soup. One that I should like, but just haven't is Creed Silver Mountain Water. I was gifted a big bottle of the stuff and there's a metallic and fungal smell that I just can' deal with.
Owen Bawn
Garden party cupcake scented
I remember Jade East as a Hai Karate knockoff. Or was it the other way around? I had both of them 50 years ago when my sisters would find the cheapest aftershave/cologne gift sets for me each Christmas "because he likes that stuff." I hated both of them. I didn't hate my sisters, I hated Hai Karate and Jade East. I need to learn how to write.
It was super potent. Two drops on the skin would fill the whole classroom. No kidding! Guys who hit the booze on the weekends and wore Jade East would have it waft out of their lungs. They applied it like they would Aqua Velva, a big mistake, overpowering.
The orientals don't work for me. Tai Winds, the Avon knock off, is highly regarded by many but smells like burnt garbage on me.
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