The Shaver's Song Parody Thread

[noodles hovar]

Piece of my Neck

(Sung to the tune of “Piece of my Heart” by Janis Joplin”)

Didn’t I start to feel like I was the shaving man, yeah!

Didn’t I buy nearly everything that a shave den possibly needs?

Honey you know that I did!

And each time I tell myself that I, well I think I’ve learned enough

But I’m gonna show you baby, that a shaver can be tough!

I want to just come on, come on, come on, come on, and



Chorus:

J-hook!

Take another little piece of my neck now baby!

Oh, oh

J-hook!

Take another little piece of my neck now baby

You know you’ve got if it makes you bleed good

Oh yes indeed



You’re there at the sink, feeling good,

And baby deep down in your heart you know that it ain’t right

Never, never, never, never, never, never hear me when cry in fright

Babe, and I cry all the time!

But each time I tell myself that I, well I can’t stand the pain

But when that slant is in my hands

I’ll sing it once again



Chorus

 

[SoftWally]

"J-hook!

Take another little piece of my neck now baby"

LOL... now THAT's funny! I've done this type of thing on other subjects, usually with lyrics you can't sing around swambo (and live). I'll have to think about this - great job though!

 

[Ravenonrock]

Catchy

 

[Atlantic59]

​

Ambassador Rex​

Oh, Lord won't you buy me an Ambassador Rex,​

My friends all got Wolfmans with their huge paychecks,​

Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my Ex,​

So, oh, Lord, won't you buy me an Ambassador Rex!​

​

Maybe you can do "Ball and Chain" next.

 

[noodles hovar]

"Against The Grain"
(Sung to the tune of “Against the Wind” by Bob Seeger)

It seems like yesterday
But it was long ago
Derby was lovely, she was the queen of my blades
There in the bathroom with the water running low
And the secrets that we shared
The stubble that we moved
Caught like a wildfire out of control
Till there was no skin left to burn and nothing left to shave

And I remember what she said to me
How she swore that it never would nick
I remember how I pulled my skin so tight
Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then

Against the grain
We were shavin' against the grain
We were young and strong, we were shavin'
Against the grain

And the years rolled slowly past
And I found myself alone
Surrounded by razors I thought were my friends
I found myself further and further from my zone
And I guess I lost my way
There were oh so many soaps
I was living to buy and buying to live
Never worried about paying or even how much I owed
Moving eight strokes a minute for months at a time
Breaking all of the rules that would bend
I began to find myself searchin'
Searchin' for closeness again and again
Against the grain
A little something against the grain
I found myself seeking closeness against the grain

Well those DFS days are past me now
I've got so much more to think about
Jawlines and my facemaps
What to leave in, what to leave out

Against the grain
I'm still shavin' against the grain
I'm older now but still shaving
Against the grain
Well I'm older now and still shaving
Against the grain

 

[Lefonque]

Bards of the Blade, well done good people.

 

[Lefonque]

Here are some conflicting songs

You decide.