Newbie PIF - Art of Shaving Unscented Shaving Kit

[nannahill]

Hi newbies

I have one of the unscented versions to pass along:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Art-Shaving-Elements-Starter/dp/B001UTR0WG

How do you win it? Easy - post up a funny joke (usual rules - keep it clean etc) and the one that makes me laugh the most will win. Under 50 posts please. I'll go through all the entries on Wednesday night and post up Thursday morning regarding the winner.

Good luck. Art of Shaving shaving products were the first ones I used.

Cheers
Nanna

 

[Smott]

Q: Where does the king keep his little armies?

Spoiler

A: Up his little sleevies!

EDIT: I realized I have over 50 posts, but enjoy the joke anyway.

 

[Sledgehammer39]

Awesome PIF!

 

[BigBull]

Wow! I wish someone PIF'd me AOS products to start! Very generous of you.

 

[OCMagnum]

Very generous PIF for sure; thank you very much! How about that one (an oldie but godie):


The deparment manager, his HR rep and the department finance guy are having lunch together when all of the sudden a genie appears and offers each one a wish.

Chatty by nature, the HR rep speaks up first and says: "I want to be on a beautiful beach in the Pacific Ocean, jet ski all day long and don't have a worry in life".......poof and the HR rep is gone.

Not to be outdone by HR, the finance guy goes next: "I want to be living in the south of France, with the love of my life by my side, an ulimited supply of cash and good Bordeaux wine"......poof and the Fiance guy is gone.

That leaves the manager; after some consideration he says to the genie: "I want those two slackers back at their desk after lunch....."


Moral of the story, always let your boss speak first.....

Thanks again for the PIF!

 

[lbkindy]

Q: How can you tell when milk has gone bad?


A: It becomes a cereal killer.

 

[mastenp]

I would love a chance at this PIF.....

The husband store:

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City.

A woman may go to this store and purchase a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

RULES FOR PURCHASING A HUSBAND:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1- These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

"That's nice," she thinks, "but I want more." So she continues upward.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!" Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.​

 

[nannahill]

OCMagnum is the winner - an oldie is a goodie. Please PM me your address and I'll mail it tomorrow. SWMBO liked mastenp's joke but she's not being obeyed this time around.

 

[natural320]

oh bollocks! too late to the party congrats OCMag!

 

[OCMagnum]

PM sent

Thank you very much Nanna for this very generous PIF, this board is truly awesome.

And thanks for the laughs to the other contestants! Better luck next time

 

[mastenp]

Congrats OC and Thanks to Nanna for the PIF opportunity