- Thread starter
- #21
Ah, just make up a good story about how you got the scar. Make it way over the top so it'll be believable.
"You think that's bad, you should see the badger!"
Ah, just make up a good story about how you got the scar. Make it way over the top so it'll be believable.
Tell every one its from a Wilkinson Sword, but what ever you do don't tell them it was from a Feather.
Tell every one its from a Wilkinson Sword, but what ever you do don't tell them it was from a Feather.
Butterfly bandages and Liquid Bandage, also Superglue works well for this as well.
And whatever you do, don't shave there until it heals!
I would tell everyone that you were at this night club and you were with your girl (a model) and this other guy started feeling her up while you were at the counter buying shots for her friends and maybe some food for some disfigured orphans. Your girlfriend backs away, but this dude, he keeps on touching her. You come back and notice this and you get up in his face and tell him to back off. So he says "let's take this outside!" You both go out back to have it out, but his friends come up and grab you. Luckily you're tougher than John Wayne and Michael Jackson (pre-Dangerous era) combined, so you throw them off and into, like, a dumpster. But while this is happening the initial dude breaks a beer bottle over the SAME DUMPSTER and slashes your face with it. You don't even flinch. You spin kick him in the face and he flies through a strategically placed window. You jump through the now shattered window and start beating him down. Finally, you grab a pool cue and smash it over his head to knock him out. You turn casually to the guys playing pool, hand one of them the cue and say, "Your shot."
That sucks that that happened, though.
I would tell everyone that you were at this night club and you were with your girl (a model) and this other guy started feeling her up while you were at the counter buying shots for her friends and maybe some food for some disfigured orphans. Your girlfriend backs away, but this dude, he keeps on touching her. You come back and notice this and you get up in his face and tell him to back off. So he says "let's take this outside!" You both go out back to have it out, but his friends come up and grab you. Luckily you're tougher than John Wayne and Michael Jackson (pre-Dangerous era) combined, so you throw them off and into, like, a dumpster. But while this is happening the initial dude breaks a beer bottle over the SAME DUMPSTER and slashes your face with it. You don't even flinch. You spin kick him in the face and he flies through a strategically placed window. You jump through the now shattered window and start beating him down. Finally, you grab a pool cue and smash it over his head to knock him out. You turn casually to the guys playing pool, hand one of them the cue and say, "Your shot."
I was just rounding up my chin from underneath, and once I got to the part on the front of the face, I felt a little resistance, and back when I used a Fusion, resistance was stubble, so I kept going, and then I saw in the mirror that I had a chunk missing. :
Yeah, THAT'S the ticket! Just make the girl Morgan Fairchild.
/apologies to Jon Lovitz
//original skit transcript
Ah, just make up a good story about how you got the scar. Make it way over the top so it'll be believable.
Isn't she just a little old for him?
Then again, as hot as she is, even at 57, I would have hit it when I was 20...
Like the fist of an angry god.
I don't know. I am working really hard right now in my life to not make assumptions. Given that he's in school he's probably in his early 20's at most, but I was 39 when I got my bachelor's...
Then again, as hot as she is, even at 57, I would have hit it when I was 20...
Like the fist of an angry god.
Seriously, the man that could have pulled me out of that would have been the next king of England.
I believe that youve been to a website called fark.com
Id pull up the pic of the meteor hitting the planet, but that might be a little much.
and yeah, Id have hit it too, and not even needed any beer.
You are correct. I would have given credit to the author but I couldn't remember which farker first said it. If you know I'll edit and give proper credit.
Tell every one its from a Wilkinson Sword, but what ever you do don't tell them it was from a Feather.
I might break out the ol' electric so I can aim all around the wound. I'll still do the rest with my HD. Maybe I'll punish it and put it in timeout for a week and use my SS. Or maybe I'll punish myself and not shave for a week. Picturing my razor right now scares me.
This ain't helpin'!
This ain't helpin'!