My love/hate relationship with chopsticks

[maxman]

Oh chopsticks! why do you have to be this way?
At first, I started using chopsticks regularly to slow down my eating. Not for every meal but wherever I could, I'd use them.
Forced me to slow down. Had a nice time. Loved every minute of it.

I know you're going to say, "oh come on now, you can just slow down with a fork you know". Well, I would love to have that kind of self-control but sadly I don't have it. Food + fork = a very quick dining experience.

Anyway, the chopsticks did work. For a time.
Then it happened.

I became efficient using them. Too efficient.

So here I am. Back at the beginning. Eating at lightspeed but now with chopsticks.

At least I'm having fun with it. I wonder what other kinds of eating utensils there are out there.

 

[Toothpick]

I never could figure them out. Or mainly - I never had the patience to figure them out. I was scoffed at by friends when we were out at a sushi restaurant and I was the only one picking up the sushi with my fingers. In that instant I felt pretty good when I said “actually, y’all are doing it wrong!” as they all had chopsticks.

I just can’t figure the darn things out.

 

[maxman]

I never could figure them out. Or mainly - I never had the patience to figure them out. I was scoffed at by friends when we were out at a sushi restaurant and I was the only one picking up the sushi with my fingers. In that instant I felt pretty good when I said “actually, y’all are doing it wrong!” as they all had chopsticks.

I just can’t figure the darn things out.

but aren't fingers just two very short chopsticks anyway?

 

[emwolf]

I had a very kindly waiter teach me when I was quite a young man. I still use them left handed, just as I would wield a fork, but since my parents (who had spent some time in the Philippines and Hong Kong in the 50's) took us to a lot of Asian restaurants when I was grown up, I got pretty decent at eating with them.

 

[Toothpick]

but aren't fingers just two very short chopsticks anyway?

Indeed. But I’ve got more control of them as they are directly tied to my motor cortex

 

[FarmerTan]

Reminds me of an ancient, politically inkorreck bit by Richard Pryor!

Are all the great comedians dead?!

 

[Multum in parvo]

If you really want to slow down a fork is also fine…

 

[FarmerTan]

If you really want to slow down a fork is also fine…

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I remember using one of those the only time I actually inhaled!

 

[maxman]

If you really want to slow down a fork is also fine…

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Ha! love this!

 

[DoctorShavegood]

 

[Bglayer]

Try using just one chopstick.

 

[Fred D]

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Training wheels, perfect!

 

[oc_in_fw]

I can use then well enough for some things, but rice is out of the question.

 

[lasta]

I used to travel to UAE/Bahrain twice a year. Eating with your hands adds a whole new dimension to the dining experience. If you follow local etiquette, hand feeding can be a slow and deliberate process...

Although, I have witnessed someone devour a large Grouper in under 10 minutes!

If you just want a small downgrade, try Korean chopsticks. The tiny, flat, silver ones. PITA for sure.

 

[Tannhauser]

I wish I had the manual dexterity to use chopsticks effectively. Unfortunately, I no longer have those fine motor skills with my hands, as they can cramp up sometimes when trying that stuff.

 

[EclipseRedRing]

I am quite proficient with using chopsticks and use them several times per week but much prefer the shorter, thinner, and more pointed Japanese style to the longer, thicker, square ended Chinese style. In Philippines 'kamayan' or 'with hands' is the traditional method of eating without utensils, but a spoon and fork is more common.

 

[Tirvine]

I have used chopsticks, usually once a week or so, for ages. Sadly, they failto slow me down. I have several pair of the pointed, lacquered ones, and I use them for eating. I also have a few wooden ones from restaurants. I use them for cooking and plating.

 

[Old Hippie]

I can use then well enough for some things, but rice is out of the question.

I asked for chopsticks in an Asian restaurant. The waiter, who was the owner, looked at me and said, "Rice is small food. Use a fork. Chopsticks for big food."

My preference in chopsticks is the long bamboo ones. I use them in the kitchen -- lately because I've misplaced the darn toast tongs and need a field expedient. I prefer them at the table as well; no use for those polished/lacquered ones that won't grip a piece of food.

I also have a couple sets of what I call "Idiot Sticks" because they are a plastic set of choptongs. Meant really for kids, but handy in the lunchbag when I was still among the gainfully employed.

O.H.

 

[ackvil]

I can use chopsticks with just about anything (except soup)!

A friend of mine had a medical problem and his doctor told him to put down his knife and fork in between every mouthful and put his hands on his lap. That worked for him.

 

[Doc4]

The "top" chop (you are holding it like a pen) is the one that moves. The "bottom" chop stays still and is the "base" that the top one pushes down upon to grasp food.

I asked for chopsticks in an Asian restaurant. The waiter, who was the owner, looked at me and said, "Rice is small food. Use a fork. Chopsticks for big food."

Lots of modifications made by oriental restaurants for us white folk. The "natives" will use chopsticks to eat rice and everything else that isn't soup ... but do have a preference for rice that clumps together.

If one is going to eat rice with chopsticks, best to do it from a rice bowl held close to the mouth (rather than all the way down on the table) and don't bring the chopsticks all the way together.

Sometimes the rice is with a liquid dish and the whole is eaten with a spoon ... like Japanese curry.