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My Handlebar Moustache Guide

Considering the amount of interest in handlebar moustaches I thought I'd make my own guide. I'm by no means an expert, but I have been sporting one for almost a year now.

The handlebar moustache is the epitome of manliness tempered with refinement. Other facial hair styles may possess equal amounts of manliness, but only the handlebar tempers this with gentlemanly refinement. A handlebar moustache is a lifestyle commitment. I don't mean that men with handlebars are inherently different, but I do mean that it takes daily commitment. One must keep it properly groomed, wax it daily, learn to eat differently, and prepare to face the world and its judgement of you.


If you are interested in growing such a statement of refined gentlemanliness, or are just curious about this type of facial foliage, I have prepared a list of handlebar facts I have gathered from personal experience, as well as a brief guide on how to grow and sport a handlebar moustache.




Little Told Handlebar Moustache Facts




1. Eating and drinking are not difficult with a handlebar, but the method used for both is different and will require some training.


2. No. 1 also applies for kissing and other things SWMBO may enjoy.


3. The majority of men will find your handlebar awe-inducing, and will often comment on its manliness. One gentleman looked at mine and muttered in awe "The handlebar...." Women over sixty and girls under six will also overwhelmingly be in support of your moustache. Women between these demographics are another story. In general they will be neutral, or opposed to the handlebar moustache. One can only assume because they are scared of your evident refined manliness. A few women in this age range will be very attracted to the handlebar however, and it is always a pleasure when one of these beauties is encountered. In general, as long as you behave yourself like a gentleman, most women will come around to liking the moustache as opposed to disliking it.


4. Teenage girls will try to take pictures of it. This has happened to me multiple times. Just pretend you're a celebrity.




How to Grow and Sport a Handlebar Moustache




1. Prepare yourself for the commitment. It will take at least three months before you have anything that looks remotely respectable and can be curled at all. Those first three months will be hell, and it will take a remarkable amount of testicular fortitude to get through them. This is the trial you must face to earn a handlebar moustache. If you wish you may begin in Movember, but that will only grant you a month of cover. It will take at least six months before you have a fully grown handlebar that looks awe inducing. That's a half year commitment to find out whether you like the look of a full handlebar on your face. Be prepared for it.


2. Purchase a fine moustache wax. I recommend Firehouse Moustache Wax or HTGAM Wax. Both are excellent brands, and I suggest trying both. When the moustache requires a wax to retain its shape (and later on to build the handlebar curls) you will want to scrape the wax with your thumb nail, rub it between your fingers until at a workable consistency, and evenly apply it to your moustache. Obviously the greater part of the wax will go to the ends to form the curls. Gently form each end together and twirl it up and out. Try to create curls of equal size and position. This will be harder than it sounds, as moustache hairs tend to like to grow in different ways in different places. You will eventually get used to forming an exquisite handlebar moustache.


Protip: Use dishwashing liquid to wash the wax off your fingertips. Otherwise you will use a lot of hand soap.


3. Each night you wax your moustache you will need to wash it out. You can use shampoo and conditioner, or a conditioning liquid designed for moustache wax removal. These liquids are designed to easily remove the wax, and specifically condition your moustache to be lustrous and soft. I would advise using shampoo and conditioner when starting out, and switching to a moustache specific conditioning liquid if it really grows on you (pun fully intended).


4. You will want to trim any hairs that form below the crease in your lip, as they will essentially be useless and make your moustache look choppy. Anything above the lip is not to be trimmed. Never trim the actual part of your moustache, it will make your moustache look clipped and stunted. When your moustache hairs grow long enough in the middle that they enter your mouth when unwaxed do not trim them, instead just wax them to the side. This will make your moustache fuller and more interconnected. NEVER trim above the lip crease.


I hope this guide will help any potential lip weasel wearers both decide whether they want to grow one, and how to grow one.




Useful Links:




Art of Manliness Handlebar Moustache Guide


UK Handlebar Moustache Club


Nick Offerman's moustache advice


League of Extraordinary Moustaches
 
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I've had one about 4 months and I agree with all stated above with the exception of women between 6 and 60 not liking it... I get a ton of positive comments from women in that age range.

Side bar, my Wife and kids (8yr old twin girls) DID NOT like it when I started it! I mentioned last weekend that I was thinking about cutting the handlebars off they all piped up and said NOOOO the handlebars stay :thumbup:
 
:lol::lol:

Ive told my Misses, I get a lot of grins, head nods, and hellos. Whether they are grinning at me because they like the handlebars or they think I'm an idiot, it makes people smile and I'm good with that :thumbup1:
 
It takes a certain amount of self confidence to be able to sport something that you're not sure causes respect or ridicule. Either way, it makes you and others feel positive, so keep rocking on!
 
Try horn rim glasses, handlebars, and a bow tie all at the same time! That turns a lot of heads on Sunday morning :thumbup1:
 
When I first started growing mine SWMBO complained every chance she got. Now that it is grown out and looking good she likes it, especially when its all waxed up.
 
I've been growing my 'tache since December. I trimmed it a couple of times and I regret it. I'm not gonna cut any more hairs and as god as my witness I am going to stop biting it.
 
I've been growing my 'tache since December. I trimmed it a couple of times and I regret it. I'm not gonna cut any more hairs and as god as my witness I am going to stop biting it.
I had a similar experience with trimming. "Oh I'll just trim it here so it's a little more even..." Cue months of regret. After trying to trim it twice and being mad at myself after, I've committed to not trimming anything other than what's clearly outside of the moustache growing zone.
 
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