Darn you! I just got coffee up my nose because I read this.
I’m going to tell my daughter this one! It has all rhe elements to be a classic Dad joke.
Jokes that make you groan
- Thread starter Captain Pre-Capsize
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I’m going to tell my daughter this one! It has all rhe elements to be a classic Dad joke.
Owen Bawn
Garden party cupcake scented
"My husband went for a medical checkup this morning and the doctor asked for a urine sample, a stool sample and a semen sample so he just took off his pants, left them with the nurse, and came home."
What do you call an animal that refuses to share the bushes?
a hedgehog
a hedgehog
He means what do you call a judge with an IQ of 50? Lawyers are not addressed as your honor.
The trouble with lawyer jokes it is said is that lawyers don't get then and other people don't think they are jokes.
The trouble with lawyer jokes it is said is that lawyers don't get then and other people don't think they are jokes.
In his defense, most judges are former practicing lawyers, and the phrasing makes the joke funny whereas saying judge instead of lawyer ruins the punch line!
Got it, Phil I was reading too fast. I suppose proves the point that lawyers do not understand lawyer jokes. 
The idea being that a judge is likely what a dumb lawyer becomes because he/she cannot make it as a lawyer in regular practice. Sort of along the lines of those you cannot do, teach. Those who cannot teach, consult.
My reading actually works, too, though. Along the lines of no matter how dumb the judge presiding over your case, you still call him/her "Your Honor," because he/she is still going to preside over and decide your case.
Now the part that is not credible is <(Told to me by a lawyer)>. Not a very smart lawyer apparently. I find that few who appear before judges tell judge jokes. There is no percentage in it! The role of folks appearing before judges is to laugh heartily at the jokes the judge tells!
The idea being that a judge is likely what a dumb lawyer becomes because he/she cannot make it as a lawyer in regular practice. Sort of along the lines of those you cannot do, teach. Those who cannot teach, consult. My reading actually works, too, though. Along the lines of no matter how dumb the judge presiding over your case, you still call him/her "Your Honor," because he/she is still going to preside over and decide your case.
Now the part that is not credible is <(Told to me by a lawyer)>. Not a very smart lawyer apparently. I find that few who appear before judges tell judge jokes. There is no percentage in it! The role of folks appearing before judges is to laugh heartily at the jokes the judge tells!
Here is the "joke"/commentary I heard regarding law school graduates and their futures.
Students graduating with all As become professors.
B students become practicing attorneys.
C students become judges.
Students graduating with all As become professors.
B students become practicing attorneys.
C students become judges.
I think it was a Woody Allen that I heard: those who cannot do, teach. Those who cannot teach, teach gym.Got it, Phil I was reading too fast. I suppose proves the point that lawyers do not understand lawyer jokes.
My reading actually works, too, though. Along the lines of no matter how dumb the judge presiding over your case, you still call him/her "Your Honor," because he/she is still going to preside over and decide your case.
Now the part that is not credible is <(Told to me by a lawyer)>. Not a very smart lawyer apparently. I find that few who appear before judges tell judge jokes. There is no percentage in it! The role of folks appearing before judges is to laugh heartily at the jokes the judge tells!
dug up a couple old threads that might have some interest:
www.badgerandblade.com
Dad Jokes
Q: What do you call someone who gets mad when they run out of bread? A: Lack toast intolerant. I started a new band last year. We called ourselves 999 Megabytes. We haven't gotten a gig yet. Let's hear them!
www.badgerandblade.com
Reminds me of the Rodney Dangerfield joke: I saw a sign in a bar window that said "topless," "bottomless." I walked in. There's nobody there."
jackgoldman123
Boring and predictable
What is the very first thing you should always do in a flip flop accident? You call the toe truck.
Got it, Phil I was reading too fast. I suppose proves the point that lawyers do not understand lawyer jokes.
My reading actually works, too, though. Along the lines of no matter how dumb the judge presiding over your case, you still call him/her "Your Honor," because he/she is still going to preside over and decide your case.
Now the part that is not credible is <(Told to me by a lawyer)>. Not a very smart lawyer apparently. I find that few who appear before judges tell judge jokes. There is no percentage in it! The role of folks appearing before judges is to laugh heartily at the jokes the judge tells!
That’s such a lawyerly reply.…
