Fired - First time ever

[devorenm]

So, with no warning between Monday morning and Tuesday afternoon last week I found out that I was going to be terminated at the beginning of December. We went through the usual HR stuff, there was a written warning that I had thirty days to improve (The criteria to improve being that I need to figure out how to bleed a turnip between now and then) but my Supervisor let me know after that my boss was determined to let me go regardless of what happened. I turned in my notice on Wednesday to leave at the end of November.

It is kind of a complicated situation and I feel like I really got railroaded which I'm still a little bit bent about (I'm being blamed for a problem that is really a result of poor planning on my bosses' part - it is a structural problem, not an effort problem on my end). But, I made a few phone calls, lined up enough work to get me through and I'm in no danger of not paying the rent or the student loans or what not.

However, I'm taking this whole being fired thing less well than I might have liked, and really personally. I've been working since I was fifteen years old, ran my own business while I was in high school, and have a reputation for having a great work ethic. Work has been the defining feature of my life (I'm 24, so there is no wife/kids/etc) so I'm feeling really bad about being fired, for the first time ever, from my first "real job" after college. Just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience and other than bourbon what you had good luck with getting over it and getting through a period of underemployment.

 

[one cut]

Well this year alone 2012 I have been dismissed, downsized and made redundant three times.
You can works as hard as you want or be part of the water cooler debate team it does not matter much, you are just a number, and when your number comes up you go.

 

[Mick]

I got fired (once)

Bought a nice 10 speed bicycle. Took unemployment, then extended it, then extended it again. I road that bike 20-50 miles a day for about 4 months (until I could no longer extend unemployment). Got in great shape and it helped take my mind off of being fired.

Then I moved on....

 

[josroge]

Man I hate to hear this. I hate that companies do this right in the middle of the holidays. I was fired about 2 years ago the day before Thanksgiving. It was about 12 weeks before my wedding. I wasn't finished with school and didn't have a clue what to do. We almost had to post pone the wedding. Fortunately I was blessed with a better job before I even drew my first unemployment check. I have found that if you do have good work ethic you typically find work sooner rather than later because you'll work hard at finding a job. I'm really sorry to hear about it though. It's a major bummer. Keep us posted and let us know where you end up. Good luck. You're in my prayers!

 

[onefallinghope]

I got fired from my engineering position in June. Was denied unemployment, cashed in my 401K to catch up on bills while looking for work. And haven't found anything yet.

My phones shut off, my credit cards are two months behind, my electricity is only on because of a medical waiver, and according to my landlord (who pounds on my door daily and takes an inventory of my possessions) I will be removed from my apartment on Friday. (my birthday is Saturday, I'll be 35)

To add insult to injury, three days after I got fired my girlfriend who had lived with me for the past two years left me because I couldn't pay her bills any more, my stepfather developed cancer in his intestine, and my mother had a stroke on the day of hurricane Sandy and is still in hospital.

Fortunately, I can move back in to my parents house so I won't be on the street.

And for Internet I take my shut off iPhone to the coffee shop Parking lot and use their wifi.

It's amazing that in a few months I went from having the life of my dreams with tons of disposable income to being completely destitute.

Things could be worse my friend, you could be in my shoes.

It sounds like at least you have a few things lined up, which is great. Because it's INSANELY difficult out there. This economy (at least where I am in southeastern CT) is completely dead, and not a single business is hiring.

Don't feel too bad about being fired, it happens to everybody (usually)

Just keep moving forward!

 

[josroge]

Also as a man it's typical to feel lost when you lose a job. It's sort of what we are programmed to do- work. We work our whole lives even though we sometimes hate it. It is still a massive defining piece for every man. That is why when a man meets another the first thing he asks is "what do you do?". So you're definitely not alone there. But the great news is that this is an opportunity to try something new that might define you in a whole new way! Nonetheless it's difficult and I definitely sympathize with you.

 

[Slash McCoy]

Being unemployed gives you more time for beer, babes, and barbecue. Make sure the babes have jobs, though.

 

[Toothpick]

i was in a supervisor role in retail. worked for the company for 3 years, 2 in the supervisor role. went to work one morning and a couple hours in to my shift without any warning at all was called in to the office for a conference call with HR and was told effective immediately my position with the company was being eliminated. it was a company wide thing, so i can understand how it was so sudden and without warning, but it was still a major shock. and what made it worse was a month prior i interviewed for a higher position but turned down their offer because i felt the salary they offered was more of an insult than a promotion. hind sight is always 20/20 but had i have taken the new position i wouldn't have been laid off. i was given 3 weeks severance pay and guaranteed unemployment.

after about 3 months of job searching i got stir crazy and re-applied for a different position in a different town with the same company. got the job and worked for about a year then due to personal reasons had to quit. then moved to TN and by this time the company had brought back my old position, so i applied again, got hired, then a year later quit again due to complete and utterly sickening management techniques, or lack of.

so just to re-cap....position was eliminated and laid off, got hired for a different postion, quit, moved out of state, my original position was reinstated, was hired, then quit again. i have since decided that I WILL NEVER WORK IN RETAIL again.

so to answer your question....the only thing that gets me through the period of unemployment is applying for jobs and feeling like im activity looking. i'm in a bad funk until i get another job. and what i hate is how everything is online now. "i'd like an application please"..ok go to our website....

 

[BZiel]

I know it may sound hollow now, but being fired is all a part of being hired. And remember this, the more difficult the job you are hired for, the greater the chance you will ultimately be fired.

One of my greatest career highlights is being fired from a near impossible marketing turnaround situation where my termination subsequently resulted in $2.5 million in unnecessary costs, the closure of an entire operating division, and the eventual demotion of both the COO and the CEO of a $100 million/yr company.

Payback comes in strange, delayed, and unusual ways.

 

[krusty]

I'm not sure about the laws where you live, but by turning in your resignation, you may have given up any right to severance pay that may have been coming your way.

 

[auk1124]

Been there, it sucks. Only advice I can give is to really try to look on it as an opportunity, not let yourself be defined by a lack of employment. As someone else suggested, start an exercise program. Take up hunting or fishing or nature photography. Get outside and enjoy your time off as much as you can. Don't be afraid to apply to jobs outside your field. Apply to whatever looks interesting. Stay positive.

To the engineer in CT, don't know what engineering field you are in, but maybe expand your horizons beyond New England. Engineeering is one of the few areas where there seems to be some demand. Look for state government jobs, and apply at some of the automotive manufacturers that are building cars in the south. You might end up in the midwest or somewhere, but I gotta believe there are still some engineering jobs out there. And by the way if all you were to your girlfriend was a paycheck, you are far, far better off without the witch.

 

[cb91710]

I'm not sure about the laws where you live, but by turning in your resignation, you may have given up any right to severance pay that may have been coming your way.

If he was going to be terminated for cause, he would not have been entitled to severance or unemployment anyways.
Severance and unemployment are only paid when it is a "dismissal"... layoff due to downsizing, position elimination, etc....
Some employers will be "generous" and not contest the unemployment filing even if the termination was for cause, but that is rare.

 

[dpmtherrien]

Sorry to hear of this, but take the unemployment pay and find something you'll like doing. If you look at this as it was ment to happen, it could be a good opportunity for you.

 

[chab]

I haven't been fired, but I'm with Josroge - we, typically males anyway - wrap up our identity and worth into our employment. I have a friend who has been lucky enough to have chosen not to work for a couple years now and I am so jealous, and yet sometimes I wonder how he keeps his self-image in line -then I realize the issue is mine, certainly not his!!! Then I'm jealous again. So I guess my advice is take time to separate your worth from your employment and listen to the others by trying to do something interesting and perhaps out of the ordinary with this time to learn about yourself and find "the next step". Good luck. And now strangely I'm jealous again.

 

[DC_MPA]

In my eyes you weren't fired. It is common practice in many places now that once you submit you notice they let you go.

My GF works in a finance role and that's their policy, same day you give a notice regardless of reasoning, you are walked out the door by close of business.

 

[Captain Pre-Capsize]

Got fired years ago, never saw it coming but should have. Wasn't making sales, got called into a room with the district guy in there and he did the deed. Security came, escorted me to my desk with a box and stood there as I cleaned it out. What bugged me more was the untrustworthiness of it but I do understand the reasoning.

Had been in high tech computer services sales and only married three years. Wifey says, "So what are you going to do?" Told her I didn't know but it was going to be something different. I took stock and realized we were in an apartment, had two old cars that were paid off and no kids. If ever there was a time this was it - took some savings and started my own business. From high tech to low tech I say. I am going on 25 years now being self employed and the past five years have never been tougher. Believe me, it is easier to get a job than to start and run a business. The life expectancy of a small business is 18 months on average. There is a lot that can go wrong and it is all up to you. Oh, and don't ever do the math and figure out how much you are making per hour.

Having said that, it has been very rewarding and fulfilling all these years and I would not change a thing. Take stock and be candid with yourself as to your gifting, your strengths and weaknesses. Then run it all past someone who knows you to verify it all. Have your pity party, I know I did and that is all part of a healthy processing. But resolve to leave it all in the rear view mirror. There will be a time - this is different for everyone - to not dwell on yesterday but focus on the opportunity of tomorrow. Best of luck to you!

 

[Toothpick]

i seem to have missed that part about turning in your notice. if it is within the companies business means then it makes sense to let you go earlier than your notice. i remember at a previous job we had an Assistant Store Manager turn in his 2 weeks notice and his boss told him right then to give him his keys and company possessions and he'll consider it 2 weeks. i think the reasoning in most cases is trust. once someone turns in their notice then there seems to be some animosity around it and you dont want them around confidential company information anymore. i've always been under the impression that most companies have a "hired at will" policy meaning they can terminate you for whatever reason at anytime. and on the other side, any notice to end employment is just a courtesy but not required, i've quit 4 jobs with zero notice and its never prevented me from getting hired anywhere. sometimes it's just time to go.

 

[CyberJCM]

I can share a bit o' cheerin' up

 

[Doc4]

However, I'm taking this whole being fired thing less well than I might have liked, and really personally. ... I'm feeling really bad about being fired, for the first time ever, from my first "real job" after college.

Many years ago when I was a junior mucky-muck the office manager where I worked at the time asked me to help him interview candidates and hire a secretary (who would work with me, mostly, hence my involvement.) He had more decades' experience than I had years', and at one point he matter-of-factly remarked to me that when one interviews candidates and hires someone, one has about a 50% chance of making the right decision.

Look, throughout your life you will be in situations where your fate is in the hands of other people's decisions. Sometimes they will make the right decision and sometimes they will make the wrong one. Just look at the draft record of your favourite sports team. (Reader's Digest version ... Michael Jordan was not drafted first overall the year the Chicago Bulls drafted him.)

It hurts to "take this personally" if you accept the quality of your boss' decision ... and ultimately accept that you should have been ... deserved to be ... fired. If (on the other hand ... and this is the hand I recommend) you are firmly convinced that your boss made a mistake in his assessment of you ... that he just decided to draft Sam Bowie ... then you can accept the setback as someone else's screw-up, and just keep on keepin' on.



(Oh, that place I helped hire the secretary for ... they fired me about 6 months later. I am now doing better on my own than I ever would have had I stayed there, and they are downsized about 50% since that time. Coulda woulda shoulda, guys ... coulda woulda shoulda.)

 

[Captain Pre-Capsize]

Michael Jordan was not drafted first overall the year the Chicago Bulls drafted him.)

I might add and this is commonly known but bears repeating - Michael Jordan did not make the cut for his high school team.

Guess what? That circumstance clearly motivated him, eh?