Famous Coffee quotes

[adamchur]

I can't see a thread on this subject
What are the funniest or wittiest quotes you've heard or read regarding coffee in a book, in a newspaper, in a film or on TV - whether fictional or quotes from real people.

Here are two of mine.....

Real life
Winston Churchill & Lady Astor
Lady Nancy Astor: If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee
Winston Churchill: And if I were your husband I would drink it

Fiction
Ian Fleming - Goldfinger
James Bond: I don't drink tea. I hate it. It's mud. Moreover, it's one of the main reasons for the downfall of the British Empire. Be a good girl and make me some coffee.

 

[MaineYooper]

"His own percolator took ten minutes to warm up, and ten minutes without coffee was ten minutes of his life wasted."King, Catriona. A Limited Justice (#1 - The Craig Modern Thriller Series) (p. 21). Crooked Cat Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Also, I read another detective story where the character states life is too short to drink bad coffee. But I can't find the book and looking at the interweb shows the phrase was not unique to that book, but instead is quite a popular saying!

 

[Rory1262]

Voltaire, when told that coffee is a slow poison: "It must be -- I've been drinking it for over 60 years and I'm not dead yet!"

 

[TexLaw]

I like what Dave Barry had to say about getting coffee:

"It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity."

 

[YKMV]

“Whoever had opened that first Starbucks in Seattle should be shot.”
― Virna DePaul, Shades of Desire

 

[ackvil]

[FONT=&quot]I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake. Lewis Black [/FONT]

 

[StillShaving]

Coffee is the common man's gold, and like gold,
it brings to every man the feeling of luxury and nobility.
Where coffee is served, there is
grace and splendor and friendship and happiness.
All cares vanish as the coffee cup is raised to the lips.

SHEIKH ABD-AL-KADIR, In Praise of Coffee​

 

[StillShaving]

"I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!" -Anonymous

"I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless." -Napoleon Bonaparte

"Black as the devil, hot as hell, pure as an angel, sweet as love." -Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord

 

[mr_eleven]

“Black as the devil, hot as hell, pure as an angel, sweet as love.”

Charles Maurice de Talleyrand

 

[The Count of Merkur Cristo]

Adam:

"I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon". President Ronald Reagan

 

[mr_eleven]

"Coffee is the common man’s gold, and like gold, it brings to every person the feeling of luxury and nobility."

Sheik-Abd-al-Kadi

 

[alpster]

"Coffee is not addicting, I've been drinking it for 50 years and I'm not addicted yet." variation on a quote from Richard Pryor.

 

[bach_rocks]

"All I need is Coffee and Jesus" -- sign above a friend's coffee pot

 

[EPfarnie]

Although I can't say I agree with it, I've always loved musing over this quote whilst imbibing a double espresso... "
“Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water.”

Women’s Petition Against Coffee (1674)

 

[EPfarnie]

I also like this one;
“Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second" Edward Abbey.

 

[Doug57]

“Without my morning coffee I’m just like a dried up piece of roast goat.”

~ Johann Sebastian Bach

 

[Ad Astra]

Sign at the Cuban Coffee Queen stand in Key West:

"Helps you do stupid things faster!"


AA

 

[bach_rocks]

Is Bach wrote a whole cantata about coffee. Here are the German lyrics, along with an English translation.
Emmanuel Music - Bach Cantata BWV 211 - Translation
Here is a recording of the whole work by eminent Bach scholars and performers.

 

[mr_eleven]

Is Bach wrote a whole cantata about coffee. Here are the German lyrics, along with an English translation.
Emmanuel Music - Bach Cantata BWV 211 - Translation
Here is a recording of the whole work by eminent Bach scholars and performers.

A little translation to help folks along...

3. Recit. (B, S) Schlendrian and Liesgen
(Schlendrian)
Thou naughty child, thou wanton hussy,
Ah, when will I achieve my way?
For me, off coffee lay!

(Liesgen)
Dear Father, do not be so strict!
For if I may not thrice each day
My little cup of coffee drink,
I'll turn indeed to my distress
Into a dried-up goat for roasting.

4. Aria (S) Liesgen
Ah! How sweet the coffee's taste is,
Sweeter than a thousand kisses,
Milder than sweet muscatel.

Coffee, coffee, I must have it,
And if someone wants to treat me,
Ah, my cup with coffee fill!

 

[MursesAnonymous]

The entire Jack Reacher series by Lee Child is peppered with frequent odes to coffee.

Personally, I like my coffee like I like my women: hot, French, and in the kitchen. -unknown