High cost of dying

[Raissermesser]

Well, that has improved from the Army's attitude in 1918 ...

"your relative's corpse was last seen sinking into the mud in Flanders somewhere. We can loan you a shovel if you want to go look for him."

"They take you over to Field 13
Where the sun is shinning
And the grass is green
And they throw in dirt
And they throw in rocks
And they don't give a ****
If they break your pine box."

BTW, you comment is interesting because it reminds me of various family members instructions in WWII to not bother trying to bring their remains home.

 

[Raissermesser]

My family has my permission to leave my corpse next to a very large ant hill, and spend the cost of a funeral on my grandkids' college.

Well, as a funeral director once remarked, funerals are for the living, not the dead. Have thought of various things for my slab, among them "See you later," and "I'm at church now."

 

[Raissermesser]

The VA gave us $250 for burial expenses. My dad didn’t retire but served in Vietnam. Died from exposure to Agent Orange. “Sorry bout that. Here’s $250”. They can suck an egg

They will also provide a small marker free of charge. Some want that on a relative's grave; some don't. Just saying.

 

[Raissermesser]

I just listened to a podcast on this a few months ago. It was interesting to say the least. Anyone can be buried at sea. I didn’t know that. You have to be at least 3 nautical miles from shore and an ocean depth of at least 600ft. Which 600ft depth might put you at over 50 miles out on some coastlines.

Some folks want the natural thing and that is indeed becoming a thing. 2-3 feet down and you are naturally recycled. There are places where they just lay your body out and let nature do the rest. Like in some countries they call it a Sky Burial. Lay you out and let vultures feast.

You can also donate your body to science. No burial costs involved there.

If you want the casket and funeral and whole 9 yards they said the average cost is 10k IIRC.

Just burn me. Or whatever. I don’t care. Dead is dead.

What sticks in my mind about natural burials are old vaultless graves I've seen, and a well driller who had to be particular at sinking a deep well at a church to maintain enough distance from the cemetery due to possible contamination. He also went with a thicker casing, IIRC.

 

[Traveling Man]

My family has strict instructions to have me cremated. Even dead, don't put me in a box.*
I have a plot in a church cemetery where I was born and raised, and we have retirement property on an island. They are to take half of my ashes to the cemetery where there is a marker and half to the dunes just above high tide. Dump them out. Just go early in the morning when no one is around, say some nice words, maybe crack a beer because that's what I would have done, and dump them. Mother Nature will make sure I get absorbed into the earth and ocean.


*Although, that might be a good idea because I'm so claustrophobic I might come out of the thing!

 

[Macfrommichigan]

There is a rubbish removal firm around here called 1-800-GOT-JUNK.

Hmm.

 

[Bakker1964]

Well, as a funeral director once remarked, funerals are for the living, not the dead. Have thought of various things for my slab, among them "See you later," and "I'm at church now."

When my age was still in the single digits, I had a book called Tombstone humour. some of the epitaphs therein were fanciful, but some were 100% legit. My favourite may be this gem . . .

Once, I wasn't
Then, I was
Now I ain't again.

 

[Acmemfg]

There can be certain religious issues that need to be addressed as well. Roman Catholicism prohibits certain “storage or disposal” of remains. Keeping Grandma’s ashes on the mantel or scattering them about is no bueno. There are other methods not permitted as well I’m sure.

 

[esswun]

I have a buddy who owns a third-generation family mortuary, so he and I have had many discussions. Prepaid is the way to go. Let's say you lock in what you want now for $5,000. You don't die for 40 years, and in that time, the price of a funeral quadruples. Your family still doesn't pay any more.

What if you take that $5,000 and invest it for 40 years (or even like 2 years) and earn a higher rate than whatever the inflation rate of funerals is? In that case prepaid only saves you the 3% or whatever that inflation rate is and you could have been making more money.

There's some risk I guess, but it shouldn't be that hard to find a mutual fund that beats funeral inflation.

 

[Traveling Man]

What if you take that $5,000 and invest it for 40 years (or even like 2 years) and earn a higher rate than whatever the inflation rate of funerals is? In that case prepaid only saves you the 3% or whatever that inflation rate is and you could have been making more money.

There's some risk I guess, but it shouldn't be that hard to find a mutual fund that beats funeral inflation.

I can't argue with that. I also can't say with 100% certainty because it's been so long since we talked about it, but I'm pretty sure the way it works is your money is held in trust. If you prepay for a barebones funeral, but over time your investment goes way up in value, you ultimately get a first class sendoff. You can pay for the aluminum casket today and wind up with mahogany when your time comes.

 

[Lightcs1776]

The VA gave us $250 for burial expenses. My dad didn’t retire but served in Vietnam. Died from exposure to Agent Orange. “Sorry bout that. Here’s $250”. They can suck an egg

Fortunately for those who have followed your father, a hero in my book, fought hard to improve the earned benefits of the military.

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

 

[Rushman2112]

I've recently started watching UK daytime TV (I am 7 hours ahead of UK before anyone thinks the worst!) and the Tour de France is on one of the commercial channels: the plethora of ads for funeral insurance is quite astonishing. Relatively low premiums, guaranteed acceptance (yeah, right), all aimed at the 55-65 market who "don't want to be a burden on the family". Oh, and a free £100 gift voucher. Very slick marketing.

Having said all that, I was fairly shocked that the average cost now in UK is around $3k.

 

[cleanshaved]

I've recently started watching UK daytime TV (I am 7 hours ahead of UK before anyone thinks the worst!) and the Tour de France is on one of the commercial channels: the plethora of ads for funeral insurance is quite astonishing. Relatively low premiums, guaranteed acceptance (yeah, right), all aimed at the 55-65 market who "don't want to be a burden on the family". Oh, and a free £100 gift voucher. Very slick marketing.

Having said all that, I was fairly shocked that the average cost now in UK is around $3k.

I have noticed at the same type of adverts here. Over 50 years old and you can sign up. Payout the agreed amount or the total of what you have contributed, which ever is greater. Sounds too good to be true...….hmmm how do they make their money? I'm picking they make their money from people who sign up and withdraw from the policy while still alive. That and earn interest off your money.

I'm not ready to push up Daises quite yet.
With that said my plan is to increase my rainy day saving for life reasons. Hey if I snuff it, then that's my funeral costs paid for.

 

[oc_in_fw]

If I am not mistaken, you can still donate your body to the Army for explosives testing. Very low cost. I want no funeral (although funds will be available for those who want to go out for fajitas. Everyone knows how I feel about fajitas- go eat some and laugh about some stupid thing(s) I did. I don’t want to be in some hole in the ground that serves as a source of guilt because those who are still living are getting on with their lives without having to come be sad where my body lies.

 

[Joshua223]

If I am not mistaken, you can still donate your body to the Army for explosives testing. Very low cost. I want no funeral (although funds will be available for those who want to go out for fajitas. Everyone knows how I feel about fajitas- go eat some and laugh about some stupid thing(s) I did. I don’t want to be in some hole in the ground that serves as a source of guilt because those who are still living are getting on with their lives without having to come be sad where my body lies.

You can donate it to The Body Farm in TN for research, or there is an art exhibit that creates art from human bodies.

Guy on a local forum recently attended a friend's memorial service. Afterwards, a Waffle House food truck was filling order.
He said, "hell yeah we know how to send them off."

 

[Bakker1964]

I don’t want to be in some hole in the ground that serves as a source of guilt because those who are still living are getting on with their lives without having to come be sad where my body lies.

My Mother has been gone for over a decade now, my Father for only 3 years. Both are buried a 30 minute drive from my home in a lovely churchyard cemetery that is in no danger of having any sort of development encroaching on the tranquility of the site (at least, not in my lifetime). I do not find it "sad" to visit them. Rather, I find it to be a time of quiet mindfulness. I can be alone with my thoughts, reflect on things going on in my life and focus on how they would deal with things. It's not exactly a "conversation", but I do feel better after a visit, and I always feel like my inner compass has been given a "reset" of sorts back towards true north.

Not sure if that makes sense to anyone but me, but I wanted to comment that having a place for others to visit and reflect on your life does not have to be a mournful experience.

 

[deafficianado]

From the post title about dying, I thought this topic was about the high cost of hair coloring in the barber shop. I didn’t know that cremation was so expensive. In some countries, they burn the body on a wooden float and send it out to the ocean. Maybe I’ll find some organization to donate my body to and they can send out the organs that are still useful to those in need.

 

[Basil]

I totally agree the costs are outrageous. My wife’s father passed away a while ago now but I still remember how they tried to gouge us for more money at every step. He passed away rather suddenly December 22 and no matter what we chose it was going to be an up charge because “we don’t normally work on Christmas” well sorry for the Inconvenience!

 

[Bakker1964]

To address the question . . . my brother is "donating his body to science". No remains to return to the family (his siblings), so no costs whatsoever related to "burial". There will, of course, be a wake, but his Estate will go intact to his beloved nieces and nephews.

 

[DocPapi]

Not sure if that makes sense to anyone but me, but I wanted to comment that having a place for others to visit and reflect on your life does not have to be a mournful experience.

Totally agree. I don't plan to become fertilizer any time soon, but when that time comes, my kids know what I want. Bring a cardboard box to recover my cremated remains, then load me up in a bunch of shotgun shells, go for a hike in my favorite mountain range and let loose. Then from time to time they can visit said mountain range, which I think is one of the most beautiful, inspiring places on this green earth, and know that I was happy to be taken there. And spend a little time contemplating life.