Best Shaving Supplies For Aliens Recently Liberated From Area 51?

[Classified00_TX]

Hear me out.

If the raid on Area 51 happens (it won’t) and if they liberate the aliens held there (they won’t) then these aliens will need shaving supplies.

I know what you’re thinking. “This is crazy. I have never even seen an image of an alien with facial hair”. Ask yourself this, “How many pictures have you seen of WW2 era men, in uniform or dressed for work, with beards?”. I believe that the lack of images of aliens with facial hair proves definitely that aliens are, at the very least meticulous about grooming. They may even be Shaving Enthusiasts!

Can you imagine traveling half way across the galaxy, being captured, then finally liberated only to find out that the only shaving supplies available were overpriced carts and canned goo? As the planets premiere shaving community, we the members of B&B, have a moral obligation to welcome these fellow shavers to freedom on Earth with the finest shaving supplies available.

We don’t need to take action yet but we should be ‘spit balling’ solutions. PIF’s? Adopt an Alien shaver? Which Proraso Preshave for Aliens?

Any thoughts?
;D


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[Rhody]

They either beam in supplies from Pasteur s or simply replicate a wolfman razor.
they dont have to shave but do so to fit in and not look too out of place.
example, gary seven always looks so dapper even wearing a rolex

 

[BigD]

• I don't think they are what we think they are.
• The only safe path is down the road to that area
• Any other path to the area is guaranteed painful death to trespassers (Radiation)
  
• If there are or were "Aliens" or "Alien Technology" at that area, it's long gone now
• Wackenhut (G4S) are not to be trifled with on these kinds of facilities

I'm pretty sure everyone on this board has a good amount of grey matter between their ears. However, for those reading this that think it will be fun to raid a Government facility, please realize the best that could happen is jail and fines to the point of bankruptcy. The worst is death. Please do not mess around.

 

[ike]

Hmm, maybe we shouldn’t supply shaving material to the aliens. If they are actually clean shaven Wookiees then without a good shave it would soon be apparent who the aliens are among us.

 

[Classified00_TX]

• I don't think they are what we think they are.
• The only safe path is down the road to that area
• Any other path to the area is guaranteed painful death to trespassers (Radiation)
  
• If there are or were "Aliens" or "Alien Technology" at that area, it's long gone now
• Wackenhut (G4S) are not to be trifled with on these kinds of facilities

I'm pretty sure everyone on this board has a good amount of grey matter between their ears. However, for those reading this that think it will be fun to raid a Government facility, please realize the best that could happen is jail and fines to the point of bankruptcy. The worst is death. Please do not mess around.

Sound advice but I don’t think that you’re getting the spirit of my original post. [emoji50]


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[malocchio]

They can just beam themselves into California and get anything they want for free.....

 

[BigD]

Sound advice but I don’t think that you’re getting the spirit of my original post. [emoji50]


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What I posted wasn't for the folks on this forum. It's for the weirdos Googling the whole Area 51 thing and landing on this thread.

For the spirit of the thread, there's nothing I can add. Maybe when it's all over and done with I can figure out something witty and funny. Right now I am seriously worried stupid will go knocking on the wrong door out in that desert. There's some serious things going on there and other facilities that are hidden for a reason. You don't hire Wakenhut because you want to treat stupid with kid gloves. I've seen these men train. These are not men you mess with as a joke or otherwise. I am honestly, seriously worried.

 

[Billy T.]

Pretty sure aliens got the latest and greatest in laser hair removal technology.

 

[FarmerTan]

I encourage everyone to visit area 51. Things are so easy in this country we need to think the herd.

Plus, I heard they are running short of human test subjects.

 

[BigD]

I encourage everyone to visit area 51. Things are so easy in this country we need to think the herd.

Plus, I heard they are running short of human test subjects.

LOL. Wrong base to be a test subject. LOL. I love it though.

 

[Esox]

Pretty sure aliens got the latest and greatest in laser hair removal technology.

I'm in!

 

[FarmerTan]

View attachment 999518

I'm in!

And I will be RIGHT behind you. Seriously.

I read a very convincing book about the weather balloon incident being more than the Feds led us to believe. This was a couple of years ago, and I forget the name, but it had interviews with people who were kids at the time that say they were threatened to keep silent. Book gave me the Willie's! So, unfortunately, I will not be raiding area 51. I hate to wet my pants in front of others.

 

[Esox]

And I will be RIGHT behind you. Seriously.

I read a very convincing book about the weather balloon incident being more than the Feds led us to believe. This was a couple of years ago, and I forget the name, but it had interviews with people who were kids at the time that say they were threatened to keep silent. Book gave me the Willie's! So, unfortunately, I will not be raiding area 51. I hate to wet my pants in front of others.

They moved them all to Dugway in Utah. Area 51 has too many tourists.

They look pretty much BBS, but you hold em down and I'll see if the MMOC can find anything to cut lol.

 

[DEPenguin]

They look pretty much BBS

That's good stuff

 

[Esox]

I stumbled, innocently, across this...

The Military Responded to Those Planning To Raid Area 51

Maybe they're using the fabled Fatip Slant and the above is a motivator to have it released to the public.

@Raven Koenes

Have you been making secret plans again? lol

 

[Vespasian]

Well, a synthetic brush, obviously. But what nonsense the entire subject is.

 

[Iloverootbeer]

They can just beam themselves into California and get anything they want for free.....

They won’t go there. If their spaceship breaks down they won’t be allowed to fix it...

 

[FarmerTan]

They won’t go there. If their spaceship breaks down they won’t be allowed to fix it...

At least not in a drive way.

 

[FarmerTan]

I encourage everyone to visit area 51. Things are so easy in this country we need to think the herd.

Plus, I heard they are running short of human test subjects.

"think the herd"...... Perhaps I should be thinned from the herd!

 

[ike]

"think the herd"...... Perhaps I should be thinned from the herd!

That's what happens when the aliens suck out some of your brain.